How to deal with hysterical performative art asshats like Garnett Genuis (without shooting him).

To no one's surprise, the right-wing, pearl-clutching, fainting couch hysteria is in full swing as countless Canadian asshats deliberately misrepresent the moderately amusing "They shoot horses, don't they?" metaphor from journalist Dale Smith:

And, Lord, it's everywhere as each of those asshats tries to outdo the other in shrieky, deranged hyperbole: "Prominent PPG reporter publicly calls for savage, brutal murder of CPC Member of Parliament, blah blah blah ...". And you wonder if there's any way to shame those twatwaffles into silence, and you realize there isn't.

In fact, there is, and it's so simple, even a child or Melissa Lanstman can understand it.

The trick is to wait for one of those asshats (let's assume it's Genuis, just for fun) to spew something like, "It's horrific and appalling that the Parliamentary Press Gallery would continue to tolerate a so-called journalist that openly called for me to be murdered!" And you wait for the chance to interview Genuis, and the question you ask is precisely this:

 

"Let's be absolutely clear -- is it your honest and sincere belief that Dale Smith was calling for you to be killed?"

Now Genuis -- not being the sharpest sandwich in the picnic basket -- will undoubtedly fall back on his vacuous pearl-clutching,

"Well, Vassy, I think everyone here would agree with me that it's shocking that a mainstream reporter and a member of the PPG would make such an appalling statement and ..."

"I'm sorry, you're not answering the question. I'm not asking how childishly hysterical you can get; I'm asking you whether you actually believe that Mr. Smith was calling for you to be killed. Are you saying you honestly believe that he was calling for your violent death? Yes or no."

At this point, even someone as intellectually limited as Genuis might realize that he's painted himself into an awkward corner, since how does he properly answer this? You see, everyone -- absolutely everyone -- understands this is performance art, it's childish, it's a game ... but how do you prove that? And you prove it by asking precisely the question I suggested above: whether Genuis truly believes what he's saying. And now he's in a bit of a pickle.

You see, in order to continue his pathetic performance art, he'd have to say "yes," at which point he would be a total laughingstock. Because we all know this outrage is totally contrived, but by asking the above question, you're forcing someone like Genuis to take ownership of it, whereupon he really ends up looking like a doofus.

On the other hand, if he doesn't want to look like a shrieky, hysterical dumbass and reluctantly admits that, no, he doesn't actually believe it, well, "Then why the fuck are you wasting my time, you pandering, manipulative colostomy bag?"

That's it, that's how you deal with this idiocy. Ask that pointed question, and insist on an answer. And watch the instant awkwardness as someone realizes they're now being asked to take full and complete ownership of their ridiculous and contrived performance art.

You're welcome.