Keean Bexte is the Theo Fleury of Jamie Sales.

 

Theo Fleury is the Jamie Sale of Theo Fleurys.

 

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

OMFG ...

Which is why this will never stop being funny:

BONUS TRACK:

JUXTAPOSE!

• Jordan Peterson fan bois: "When Liberals cry, it's because they're delicate, pansy-assed snowflakes who need to suck it up and grow a pair."
• Also Jordan Peterson fan bois: "When Jordan Peterson cries, it's only because he cares so deeply about the world, and it makes me love him even more."

See how that works? 

JUXTAPOSE!

• Dr. Jordan B. Peterson makes a fortune lecturing pansy-ass incels on the importance of being real men.
• Dr. Jordan B. Peterson cries pathetically on air because Olivia Wilde made fun of him.

AFTERSNARK: Best-selling author who spends 341 days a year on air being interviewed by every worthless, right-wing media outlet around will now whine about being marginalized:

Seriously, that's what he's whining about. I'm not joking.

This cannot be real.

This cannot possibly be real:

APPARENTLY, this is real, which inspires the obvious question ... what is a "skilled" religious professional? What level of "skill" does it take to believe wholeheartedly and unabashedly in an invisible sky fairy?

P.S. It must be infuriating for Alberta's health care professionals, who have been absolutely fucked over by the UCP, to read that that same government is bending over backwards to accommodate the import of Bible-whomping imbeciles. That's gotta sting.

Jesus Christ, the whiny burning stupid.

OFFS ...

Notice anything missing here? Why, yes ... the flight attendant's reason for this, which she would certainly have broadcast to the passengers, and which was most likely (and I have encountered this) that the customs area was so congested that they wanted to give it a chance to clear.

As an alternative, Sue-Ann Levy is simply a whiny twatwaffle with a ludicrous sense of entitlement. There's that, too.

A simple question.

If no one in the Conservative Party of Canada can understand a simple concept like, "If the carbon tax increases, rebates will similarly increase," then why the fuck would you want people that stupid running the country?

HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! I so called it again.

On September 23, I published this.

Five days later:

You people really don't appreciate me enough. You know that, right?

Rebel News' "Fight the Fines" clients now learning the hard way.

It's not like I haven't warned you about this maybe eleventy gazillion times over the last couple years, but here's the latest casualty of Rebel News' "Fight the Fines" supergrift, wherein Rebel News' openly encouraged people to deliberately not follow public health regulations and amass spectacular fines with the promise of what has turned out to be hilariously inept but free legal representation:

So, a few things about this.

First, as I have explained on more occasions than I care to count, I warned that that entire grift involved Der Rebel offering, not to pay any fines, but to simply hand over bags of cash to a carefully-selected group of lawyers who would get thigh-suckingly rich off of all that dosh, while hanging said clients out to dry to pay their own fines once they lost in the court. (And if one follows developments, many of those gullible marks are now losing bigly.) In any event, that is observation one: Not a dime of any of that donated money will ever see its way into paying the eventual fines; rather, every dollar of it is going to Rebel News and its lawyers. This is not a controversial statement, it's in the very definition of that grift:

None of the above is surprising, this has been covered before. But there's more.

On top of the fines, said gullible marks will also be liable for associated court costs, which Rebel News will not pay and which, in some cases, are actually more than the fines:

So who knows what the costs are in this case, but Church on the Vine is going to have to hand over all of that as well. And is that as bad as it gets? Of course not.

Note above that Rebel News' "Queen of the Grift" Sheila Gunn Reid (she of the chicken bucket fundraiser) insists that, by gosh, they're going to stand by those devoutly religious lawbreakers and, by gosh, they're going to appeal, which will undoubtedly have the following results:

• They're going to lose again and be hit with further costs, and
• Once again, a lawyer or two is going to get a bag of cash and Church of the Vine is going to have to hand over tons of fines and costs, whereupon Rebel News will undoubtedly tell them, "Well, we tried but, hey, it sucks to be you."

But even after all that, there is one point that I think is going unappreciated -- that any competent and ethical lawyer would have told these people that they were going to lose right from the get-go. Without question. No doubt about it.

You see, despite what the yammering legal blowhards from Der Rebel might have said, there were never any constitutional or Charter rights issues in play here. None. Ever. Despite what Gunn Reid has been spewing all this time, this never had anything to do with repression of religion or whatever the fucking nonsense was that she was horking up. It was nothing more than public health regulations, and the fact that some people chose to ignore them. You don't need to take my word for this; go back and review the previous rulings, that make all of this absolutely clear.

In short, any responsible and principled lawyer, on being presented this case (or others like it), would have said, "You're screwed. You broke the law." Instead, all of the evidence suggests that those opportunistic lawyers strung along numerous clients with the promise of eventual victory based on, you know, the Charter, and the British North America Act, and the Magna Carta, and the Code of Hamunaptra, and on and on and tediously on, never once advising their clients that, in all likelihood, they were going to lose.

And now we're seeing the fallout from all of that, as one "Fight the Fines" client after another, after fucking around, is now finding out. And it's safe to say, there are going to be some very expensive lessons.

On the other hand, churches going out of business is never a bad thing so ... there's that.

P.S. Legal-type minds are invited to weigh in on the ethics involved in:

1. Rebel News openly encouraging people to break the law in terms of refusing to obey public health regulations, followed by ...
2. ... lawyers supplied by that same Rebel News assuring their clients that their victory in court was a slam-dunk sure thing, when those lawyers absolutely must have known that was not even remotely true.

Does any Canadian law society address these sorts of shenanigans? Just curious.

Someone needs to get Keean Bexte the psychological help he desperately needs.

Ex-Rebeler Keean Bexte's personal obsession with Justin Trudeau has recently evolved from slightly creepy to full-blown "Holy fuck, that boy needs an intervention and doesn't he have any friends that want to arrange one?":

Bexte's truly disturbing obsession with everything Trudeau manifests itself in the form of everything -- absolutely everything -- somehow being the singular initiative of one man, from "Trudeau's gun grab" to "Trudeau's vaccine and mask mandates" to "Trudeau's RCMP" to "Trudeau's invocation of the Emergencies Act" to "Trudeau's ArriveCAN app" to ... well, you get the idea.

This used to be just slightly off-putting and creepy; these days, it's way past disturbing and it's past time to call it for what it is -- that boy is not mentally well and bears watching, lest he end up chasing the Prime Minister down a hotel hallway:

JUXTAPOSE!

Rebel News "journalist" who, under absolutely no conceivable circumstances should be allowed to vote, will now lecture you on who should be (*checks notes*) allowed to vote.

BREAKING!

New CPC leader Pierre Poilievre announces that, while he has a gold-plated, lifetime pension and a family-wide dental plan, he admits that he would like other parents' kids' teeth to rot, and for them to all catch COVID and die.

That is all.

In today's episode of "Holy shit, that tweet didn't age well!", ...

 

Tune in tomorrow when we check in on Skippy's pimping of cryptocurrency only a few months ago.

Dear Christina Bobb: About that attorney-client privilege ...

In the first two minutes of this YouTube video from one of my regular reads, "Meidas Touch," Ben Meiselas makes a fascinating point. It's common knowledge that lawyers for Donald Trump are heading for the doors, there's nothing particularly novel about that.

What is interesting is how some of these whackjobs are now publicly claiming that not only do they no longer work for Trump, why, they've never worked for him and what gave anyone the impression that they ever had?

Obvious lies aside, what Meiselas points out is that if they've publicly disavowed any legal connection with Donald Trump, then any communications they had with Trump at any time are most emphatically not protected by attorney-client privilege, and it makes one wonder if any of these intellectual defectives realize the consequences of their new position, but these people are definitely not the sharpest sandwiches in the picnic basket so one can always crack open the popcorn and watch this play out.

Phone records, anyone?

JUXTAPOSE!

"Freedom Convoy": "I took a leave of absence from my job in Red Deer and, without my employer's permission, took one of his big rigs, blew a pile of money dressing it up with Canadian flags and 'FUCK TRUDEAU' banners, spent thousands of dollars driving across a prairie winter and Northern Ontario eating in shitty restaurants to hook up with a bunch of Nazis and racists in Ottawa where I spent three weeks sleeping in my truck in February and getting parking tickets and pissing into a bottle, and the cops finally came and seized my truck, and my boss found out and fired me, and my wife left me and took the kids and now I'm wondering how to get home and who's going to hire me now that my trucker's license was revoked and my insurance was suspended, and I'm still due in court later this year and might end up with a criminal record but ... FREEDOM!!!"

Me: "I spent 14 minutes yesterday getting a free booster at a Shoppers Drug Mart down the street. But, hey, good luck with your life choices." 

BREAKING!

Alberta announces it will no longer participate in the federal oil subsidies program. It will not enforce it, nor force any Alberta oil companies to take that money. Justice Minister Tyler Shandro calls Ottawa's relentless annual giveaway of billions of federal dollars to Alberta's obscenely wealthy oil companies "politically motivated" and "an overreach."

No, no, just kidding. I mean, can you imagine?

The rage farming of Emily Brown.

Conservative Emily Brown insists that one of her "constituents" is livid over, well, whatever:

And then there's reality:

The "Stella Luna Gelato" takeaway.

In the midst of the current Rebecca Bromwich-driven dust-up regarding whether local Ottawa eatery Stella Luna should be forgiven for actively supporting the massively not-peaceful and illegal three-week occupation of downtown Ottawa last February, there is one point that I feel is going unaddressed.

In this case (and, it appears, many others), the after-the-fact excuse for that kind of appalling behaviour seems to be, "Well, we donated early on when it was just a fun protest and we wanted to support them and their cause, and we had no idea that it would turn into an actual siege with Nazis and racists and white nationalists and people carrying Confederate flags and 'Fuck Trudeau' banners and people openly calling for Liberals to be killed and ... blah blah blah. We had no idea!"

This. Is. Bullshit.

The ugliness of that three weeks in February did not start out pleasantly and slowly morph into what was pretty much a military action, replete with organizers demanding the resignation of the government and parading around with Nazi banners and the like. It was what it was right from the beginning; in fact, even before the first truck rolled into town.

There is no conceivable way that someone can sincerely claim that they had no idea what was coming. Daily news coverage made it unmistakably clear that what was converging on Ottawa was an army of angry insurrectionists, many of their vehicles festooned with anti-Trudeau vulgarity, and the occasional protester suggesting that the proper way to deal with the Prime Minister was with a bullet or two.

We knew what was coming. We all knew what was coming. So stop lying about it.

It's ludicrous for anyone to justify their treasonous support for the financially devastating occupation of downtown Ottawa for three weeks with the lame excuse that, gosh, they just didn't know, if only someone had told them. Everybody told them, and they didn't care, and they donated anyway.

More to the point, even if that occupying force had been lawful and peaceful and pleasant and filled with nothing more than hot tubs and bouncy castles, keep in mind that its public purpose was to demand that the government stop enforcing public health policy whose only purpose was to try to stop people from getting sick and dying of COVID-19.

So, no, Stella Luna (and others), you don't get a pass on your financial support of all that fascism. You knew what this was all about, and you handed over cash, anyway. Now you can live with the consequences.

Holy burning stupid, Batman!

I got nothing. Seriously.

It's jab time again.

I just made an appointment for tomorrow for my bivalent COVID-19 booster tomorrow. That will be my fifth -- yes, fifth -- jab since this nightmare started. Curiously, I have yet to come down with COVID-19.

I'm sure it's just a coincidence, right? Right?

JUXTAPOSE!

In Canada, the Left has:

By contrast, the Right has:

Any questions?

Too little. Too late. Sit down.

OFFS ...

But now ...

Shut up. Please, just shut up.

P.S. I don't think people recognize the fundamental problem Bromwich has here, and it's that, regardless of what people think of Stella Luna, it seems spectacularly unethical for Bromwich to be promoting a private business as part of her political campaign. What is it about Stella Luna that Bromwich thinks entitles them to free publicity as part of her campaign?

JUXTAPOSE!

Man who literally hand-delivered coffee and pastries to "Freedom Convoy" participants who berated, harassed and threatened women during "Freedom Convoy" occupation in February will now be absolutely outraged by (*checks notes*) the berating, harassing and threatening of women.

OK, then.

TUPOC: So what was the point of all that, then?

Now that the "United People of Canada" have had their asses kicked out of St. Brigid's, and had their asses handed to them in court to the tune of $58,000 in costs, we ponder the obvious question -- what in the name of Garnett Genuis' performance art and childish whining was that all about?

More specifically, given how disastrously badly this ended for them, and how TUPOC director William Komer brought such unflattering attention to himself that former clients of his that he stiffed in terms of wedding photos are going after him for compensation, we ask again: How exactly did Komer and his fellow TUPOCheads think this was going to end?

Think about this. They planned on buying a $6M property, but failed to hand over any actual cash other than that paltry, initial deposit of $5,000. In what universe did any of them think they could conceivably carry through with this plan to conclude the purchase? And as unlikely as it seems, a good friend suggests only one plausible explanation.

They honestly thought they would be able to crowdfund the rest.

Seriously, as ridiculous as it sounds, the only explanation that is even remotely defensible is that Komer and TUPOC really and truly thought they could grift enough in the space of a few months to complete the deal. And why not?

Speculating wildly, it seems that Komer and his merry band of lunatics must have seen the millions and millions rolling in for the "Freedom Convoy" earlier this year and simply assumed they'd be just as popular. Surely (Komer would have thought), if all those idiots were happy to hand over millions just months ago, he could ride the same wave and just sit on the front steps at St. Brigid's and revel in the donations sweeping over him.

But it didn't work out that way, as evidenced by the clear desperation of the panicked plea for $100,000 within a day to keep things moving along:

Sure, it sounds absurd, but other than TUPOC suffering under the delusion that they were going to get all that cash from gulllible doofuses in time to pull this off, what other explanation is there?

P.S. It's important to realize that TUPOC is not actually gone, as they are apparently still trying to weasel their way back into Lowertown's good graces by ...

It is entirely unclear what the point of this shameless and opportunistic pandering is, but the takeaway here is that they haven't given up on scamming the local community and still bear watching.

Um, no.

Just ... no.

Because the Freedom Convoy was temporary, but fuck around and find out should be forever.

I think we're gonna need a bigger pan.

 

And there you go ...

I'd say that worked out.

Pretty sure they would never find the body.

And in the ongoing series of "I'm 24 years old, a single mother of 6 with a Ph.D in theoretical astrophysics and the CEO of a multi-billion dollar embedded Linux company specializing in deep-sea robotics who spends her spare time running an animal shelter in Bora Bora and being a Victoria's Secret model and I think Trudeau Must Go," here's Captain "Pure Blood Sperm" Alberta, bragging about his participation in Ottawa's trucker occupation:

Here's a thought, Cap'n Sperm ... come on back to Ottawa for a visit. Really, pop on out here, and drop into any of the bars on Elgin Street or in the Byward Market that were hammered financially by your convoy, and belly up to the bar and announce to all how you were here in February, doing your part to support all those truckers and Nazis and white nationalists to the extent of actually chauffeuring fuel to them every day, but make sure you mention that it was just because you wanted to support everyone else's "freedom."

Let us know how that turns out. And where to send your remains.

I'm sorry ... wut?

 And here's Jason Kenney:

Yeah, about that:

I'm sorry, Jason, where were we? Ah, yes, the inherent civility of conservatism. Continue.

Jesus Christ ...

... can we have a single day without Rebel News being this fucking racist?

OFFS ...

... do we really need to be giving the Conservative Party of Canada any ideas?

How to deal with hysterical performative art asshats like Garnett Genuis (without shooting him).

To no one's surprise, the right-wing, pearl-clutching, fainting couch hysteria is in full swing as countless Canadian asshats deliberately misrepresent the moderately amusing "They shoot horses, don't they?" metaphor from journalist Dale Smith:

And, Lord, it's everywhere as each of those asshats tries to outdo the other in shrieky, deranged hyperbole: "Prominent PPG reporter publicly calls for savage, brutal murder of CPC Member of Parliament, blah blah blah ...". And you wonder if there's any way to shame those twatwaffles into silence, and you realize there isn't.

In fact, there is, and it's so simple, even a child or Melissa Lanstman can understand it.

The trick is to wait for one of those asshats (let's assume it's Genuis, just for fun) to spew something like, "It's horrific and appalling that the Parliamentary Press Gallery would continue to tolerate a so-called journalist that openly called for me to be murdered!" And you wait for the chance to interview Genuis, and the question you ask is precisely this:

 

"Let's be absolutely clear -- is it your honest and sincere belief that Dale Smith was calling for you to be killed?"

Now Genuis -- not being the sharpest sandwich in the picnic basket -- will undoubtedly fall back on his vacuous pearl-clutching,

"Well, Vassy, I think everyone here would agree with me that it's shocking that a mainstream reporter and a member of the PPG would make such an appalling statement and ..."

"I'm sorry, you're not answering the question. I'm not asking how childishly hysterical you can get; I'm asking you whether you actually believe that Mr. Smith was calling for you to be killed. Are you saying you honestly believe that he was calling for your violent death? Yes or no."

At this point, even someone as intellectually limited as Genuis might realize that he's painted himself into an awkward corner, since how does he properly answer this? You see, everyone -- absolutely everyone -- understands this is performance art, it's childish, it's a game ... but how do you prove that? And you prove it by asking precisely the question I suggested above: whether Genuis truly believes what he's saying. And now he's in a bit of a pickle.

You see, in order to continue his pathetic performance art, he'd have to say "yes," at which point he would be a total laughingstock. Because we all know this outrage is totally contrived, but by asking the above question, you're forcing someone like Genuis to take ownership of it, whereupon he really ends up looking like a doofus.

On the other hand, if he doesn't want to look like a shrieky, hysterical dumbass and reluctantly admits that, no, he doesn't actually believe it, well, "Then why the fuck are you wasting my time, you pandering, manipulative colostomy bag?"

That's it, that's how you deal with this idiocy. Ask that pointed question, and insist on an answer. And watch the instant awkwardness as someone realizes they're now being asked to take full and complete ownership of their ridiculous and contrived performance art.

You're welcome.

BREAKING! TUPOC finally POCed off.

All quiet on the wingnut front this morning, as the parking lot at St. Brigid's as vacant as Brian Lilley's moral compass:

What's left are those tacky TUPOC banners still hanging outside the front door so if you're bored and in the neighbourhood and you need some rags for that occasional motorcycle repair, well, you didn't hear it from me.

Oh, wait, you did.

The company you keep.

Rebel News favourites "Viva Frei" and Mike Cernovich leaping to the defense of Rebel News favourite Alex Jones:

All we need is Rebel News favourite Gavin McInnes screaming incoherently about "goddamn motherfucking Jews" to complete the picture.

SHOCKING! SHOCKING, I TELL YOU!!

Rather than explain from scratch this current shriek-saturated bloviating from Canada's right-wing fascist white nationalist, neo-Nazi segment, I will first send you here as a warmup. When you finish, come on back and we'll put that in context.

La dee da ...

So what's my point? Simple. The current rage farm sweeping Canada's conservatives is not even remotely grassroots or spontaneous; rather, it is carefully provoked, and is initiated with the public announcement that something is, well, shocking, or appalling, or disgaceful, or ... you get the idea.

What we are seeing is a significant portion of Canadians who are so simple that they need to be told when to be angry. None of this is spontaneous -- this is a very carefully choreographed program of rage generation using the appropriate adjectives to trigger the right people.

If you think I'm kidding, let's put this to the test. Consider that recent news "event" involving Prime Minister Justin Trudeau in a piano bar. Consider further if the headline had read, say, "In London for Queen's funeral, PM Justin Trudeau joins other Canadians at hotel piano bar for singalong."

Now, if that's all that it said, almost everyone would have thought, "Yeah, OK, whatever, what's the big deal?" Instead, without exception, Canada's inter-related right-wing rage badgers immediately started slapping on adjectives, "DISGRACEFUL!!!! SHOCKING!!! APPALLING!!! PM Justin Trudeau joins other Canadians at hotel piano bar for singalong!!!"

It doesn't even matter if most of the words are identical -- what matters is that the accompanying adjective is the signal for people to be immediately and publicly angry. Livid. Outraged. Appalled. Besides themselves with apoplexy.

Quite simply, we are talking about people who are so intellectually limited that they need to be ordered to be shocked and outraged on demand. Which they do, right on cue. It doesn't matter the innocuousness of the event -- slap an adjective or two on the description, and it's now pretty much a dog whistle for the appropriate people to feign completely contrived outrage as if this is, you know, something meaningful.

And now that you know, you'll never read the news again the same way, will you?

P.S. If someone could feed Garnett Genuis through a woodchipper, that'd be great, thanks.

I already see my next toy.

I'm sure the cat will not object.

Never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever stop being funny.

 

Yup, I called it. (Well, I was planning to.)

As soon as I saw journalist Dale Smith's tweet about the indescribable lameness of a CPC MP's performance in QP, and Smith's quip of, if a horse was that lame, they'd shoot it, my absolutely first reaction was that it was only a matter of time before the entire Canadian Rage-o-Sphere exploded in, well, Patrick Ross-level bad faith and rage, shrieking something like:

"SHOCKING!!! Woke, intolerant Liberal shill publicly calls for savage, brutal murder of Conservative politician!!!"

Sadly, I got distracted before I could post that, which is a shame since, well:

P.S. That last tweet was from the new leader of the CPC, who publicly supported the white nationalist "Freedom Convoy" that descended on Ottawa for three weeks and really did call for the murder of Prime Minister Justin Trudeau. But, hey, let's not quibble over consistency.

P.P.S. If we want to argue about shooting-level lameness, we can start with House of Commons Speaker Anthony Rota. Fight me on that.

Still funny as hell.

Oh, my ...

A modest proposal.

When the federal government announces an intention to combat online disinformation, racism, bigotry and hate speech, it's worth keeping track of the people who get upset by that idea.

BREAKING!

Canadian right-wingers who despise transgender people shocked to learn that Jamie Sale's original name was "Theo Fleury."

JUXTAPOSE!

Man who aggressively and relentlessly promoted "#TrudeauMustGo" hashtag to boost its prominence on social media now insists that the hashtag's current prominence on social media cannot be ignored.