Tuesday, June 02, 2026

Chronicles of Twatrick: The December 2022 Affidavit.

I have mentioned numerous times the utterly meritless August 2022 defamation lawsuit that was filed against me by undischarged bankrupt and middle-aged oil patch swamper Patrick "Quintuple Threat Nexus Chick Magnet" Ross, but you've always had to take my word that it was a pile of utter rubbish. Well, by way of support, I will gift you the main body of Patrick's accompanying Affidavit of December 2022, which is supposed to bolster his filing of malicious defamation against me.

I will not attempt to sway your thinking on the matter; I will post this affidavit without comment and let my long-suffering readers opine on how well they think this locks down an accusation of defamation against me.

And away we go:





Your thoughts, if you would, as to how well Patrick locked down his defamation lawsuit against me with this Affidavit?

 

P.S. It's worth noting what Patrick is asking for from the August 2022 Statement of Claim:


 

That's right ... four million dollars.

Four.

Million.

Dollars.

Plus costs. Don't forget costs.

ONE MORE THING FOR NOW:  As many people will know, defamation requires someone making what is called a "statement of fact"; that is, uttering something as being unquestionably factual or true. It is not enough to make statements of opinion; statements of opinion do not rise to the level of defamation as long as it's clear that what is being uttered is clearly opinion.

Witness, then, this snippet from a November 2022 Affidavit of Patrick's, which he claims represents defamation on my part:


Do you see the problem? Well, of course you do since, in literally every single paragraph quoted by Patrick, I am clearly stating that what I am reporting is what I heard, with such qualifiers as:

  •  "according to rumours"
  • "I have been informed"
  • "I have been told"
  • "If any of the above is true"

Not only does none of this rise to the level of statement of fact, it does not even rise to the level of statement of opinion since all I do is present what I have been told by others, even going so far as to issue the clear disclaimer, "which I have not yet substantiated." By definition, none of this qualifies as defamation, but it is apparently what Patrick considers the smoking gun.

DEFAMATION CLARIFICATION: I worded the above unclearly so let's let Google AI explain the distinction between statements of fact versus statements of opinion:

 

So, yes, statements of opinion can rise to the level of defamation if they have no basis but, again, as you can see (and as Patrick himself quoted), I was not even publishing statements of opinion; that is, I was not saying, "This is what I believe." Rather (and as you can clearly read), all I was saying was, "This is what I have heard from others, and which has not even been substantiated."

There is no possible case for defamation with those qualifiers. It's baffling that Patrick does not understand that.

BONUS TRACK: I will throw in one last bit of Patrick-inspired stupid to make sure you truly grok the worthlessness of Patrick's action. Regular readers will already know that I have, on several occasions, asked willing people to do a drive-by of "Casa Ross" (the Lloydminster residence of the late and spectacularly unlamented Ken Ross) and let me know what they saw -- perhaps Patrick, perhaps his truck, perhaps evidence of someone living there, whatever. My instructions were clear -- no trespassing, just whatever you could glean from the sidewalk or street out front, remaining on public property the whole time.

You can guess what happened next, as Patrick immediately described this as "illegal surveillance" conducted by unlicensed investigators who were therefore involved in criminal activity. Here's the relevant snippet from Patrick's November 2022 Affidavit:

 

This suggestion is absolute hogwash as Canadian law (as summarized by Google) makes clear:

 

In short, anyone has the right to observe as much as they want the "public" areas of another's property as long as they refrain from trespassing.

As you can see, Patrick's lawsuit against me is such utter garbage. 

 

Friday, May 29, 2026

Chronicles of Twatrick: Something coming down the road.

I will be somewhat frustrating in this post as I am working on something related to Lloydminster's favourite undischarged bankrupt and financial fugitive Patrick "Super Quintuple Threat Nexus Dragon Fire Soft Core Porn Chick Magnet" Ross but I can't tell you what it is just yet.

For now, I will simply ask my faithful and long-suffering followers to keep a lookout for Patrick and let me know where he seems to be living and working and hanging out and so on, as all of that will be relevant for what is to come.

Thank you kindly. 

Thursday, May 21, 2026

Chronicles of Twatrick: And the interest keeps piling up ...

Nothing really new to report on another monthly interestversary, but it's worth calculating at least a ballpark figure as to the extent of Patrick's soul-crushing debt to me.

From back in August 2021, the associated judge did the arithmetic and came up with:


Now, if we take that outstanding amount and ask Google what the situation is today ...  oh, dear ...

 


In all fairness, not long after the judge published her arithmetic, I did manage to forcibly wrest from Patrick (via a collections order) a few thousand dollars before he closed his credit union account to keep me from taking any more, so a more accurate accounting suggests he is on the hook to me for about $125,000 -- an amount going up by several hundred dollars per month.

It's also amusing to ponder the fact that, since Patrick clearly has no intention of ever paying me anything and continues to keep running and hiding, it's not unreasonable to think about how much he will owe me when he turns 50, and it's easy enough to ask Google to calculate that:

That's right ... Patrick's 50-year birthday present will be to understand that he will owe me in the neighbourhood of $170,000, so it remains to be seen if he can dodge, weave and evade long enough to run up that kind of bill.

Check back in five years, I guess.

P.S. Quite separate from what he owes me, Patrick would still have to independently pay some $25,000 to get out of bankruptcy -- those two debts are entirely unrelated, so Patrick is currently in debt to the tune of about $150,000. Interesting, as I remember the old days when Patrick was quite keen to talk smack about me and openly challenged me to try to do something about his malicious defamation:


Yeah, that didn't work out that well for Patrick, did it?

GOOD LORD, but if you want to truly appreciate Patrick's slimy dishonesty, someone pointed me at this recent Twitter post from Patrick, crowing about how Mark Carney's name allegedly appears in the Epstein files:


 If you blow up that second screenshot, you see:

 

which looks suspicious given that trailing comma since that suggests that Google wasn't finished explaining it, so I decided to ask Google the same question, and it should surprise you not in the slightest that Patrick chopped off the rest of that sentence:

 

 

This is the sort of sleaziness that has resulted in Patrick owing tons of cash for malicious defamation.

Saturday, April 25, 2026

Chronicles of Twatrick: Ah, the irony.

This would be the massively-indebted undischarged bankrupt, financial fugitive and basement-dwelling soft core porn author Patrick "Super Quintuple Threat Chick Magnet" Ross, suggesting that people who publicly misrepresent others should be hit with a judgment that would scare them straight:

 


 

I assume I do not have to explain the irony.

P.S. I am still interested in any recent sightings of Patrick, especially in the area of Casa Ross in Lloydminster, where it appears he has taken up residence in the basement. Any photos of vehicles in the driveway or on the street would be appreciated. 

Thursday, April 16, 2026

Chronicles of Twatrick: Not exactly an evil genius.

One of my many Patrick Ross-related confidential informants (CIs) informs me that undischarged bankrupt and man in desperate need of validation Patrick Ross did something rather revealing in a recent one of Patrick's unwatched and unwatchable YouTube podcasts:

 

(It's unclear why Patrick invests the time it takes to create these boring screeeds when they typically get -- as you can see -- all of 28 views over 11 hours, many of those by my CIs who have vowed to track his YouTube inanity. But ... onward.)

The revealing bit is that, starting at the 3-minute mark for about 15 seconds, Patrick compares the attention received by others as opposed to (his words exactly), "a guy recording in the basement in Grande Prairie ...".

Um ... wut?

What a fascinating disclosure, coming as it is out of nowhere and having nothing to do with the topic of the podcast. Is there any question that Patrick is referring to himself, and hoping the viewer accepts that bizarre reveal?  I think it's obvious that Patrick is desperately trying to misdirect the viewer into thinking that he's in Grande Prairie, Alberta, and here's why.

First, why would Patrick use such an explicit and informative description, rather than simply refer to himself as, say, "a guy recording a podcast in a basement"? What informative value does it bring to the video to describe the location of the basement as being in Grande Prairie? None, suggesting he's only throwing that in there to mislead.

More to the point, given that Patrick has spent the last decade frantically trying to avoid creditors and process servers, why would he generously now tell everyone where he is? Answer: Because it's simply not true.

Finally, if one were to believe Patrick that he is in Grande Prairie and in a basement, one would naturally assume that it's because he's renting someone's basement so he can continue working there. But that flies in the face of everything you see in the screenshot above, which clearly shows a basement furnished with the type of juvenile sports paraphernalia you would expect would have been collected over the years by Patrick and his late and unlamented father; in other words, in a basement at Casa Ross in Lloydminster, Saskatchewan. But if Patrick wants to play this silly game, then let's play it with him.

I invite all of my CIs in both Lloydminster and Grande Prairie to be on the lookout for Patrick, so we can resolve this one way or the other. Keep on the lookout for Patrick, and report back and we'll settle this mystery one way or the other. And as for Patrick's feeble attempt at misdirection, well, he's never really been an evil genius, has he? 

Friday, April 10, 2026

Chronicles of Twatrick: Oh, what fresh hell is this?

Courtesy of one of my many, many confidential informants, here's quite the thread over on Twitter about 44-year-old undischarged bankrupt and social pariah Patrick "Super Duper Nexus Quintuple Threat High School Chick Magnet" Ross. This series of tweets:

 

 

strongly suggests what I already suspected -- that Patrick is now holed up in the basement at Casa Ross in Lloydminster, SK and surviving on the relentlessly waning generosity of his evolutionarily-stunted siblings.

In any event, knowing where he is now is going to make some of my plans for him much, much easier.

P.S. I've been told on a number of occasions that other parties are trying to serve Patrick with legal filings. Well, now's your chance given the compelling evidence that he's now living in the basement at Casa Ross. And I think it would be entertaining to have his sibling(s) have to deal with the occasional process server.

P.P.S. Given how Patrick appears to be living out of his late parents' basement, it's always possible that he's working somewhere in Saskatchewan, so I'm definitely interested in any information about where Patrick is hanging out these days and if/where he's employed. 

Tuesday, March 31, 2026

Chronicles of Twatrick: Cranking up the surveillance.

Trying to make up for lost time after being so quiet on this topic and, while I've mentioned this earlier, I'm going to emphasize that, for reasons I don't want to get into just yet, I want any interested and helpful parties to do whatever they can to keep tabs on undischarged bankrupt and financial fugitive Patrick Ross. This can include physical drive-bys of Casa Ross in Lloydminster (complete with photos of vehicles and license plates if possible), perusing Patrick's postings on various social media and so on. I will, however, explain at least a little of why I'm particularly interested in clarifying Patrick's location these days. 

Long-time followers might remember that Patrick once filed a ridiculous and meritless defamation lawsuit against me, and has subsequently avoided moving it forward, and the reason for that seems obvious. In all of Patrick's legal filings, he's listed his address for legal service as (you guessed it) the address of Casa Ross in Lloydminster, even when he was working in northern Alberta and was rarely in Lloydminster to receive service.

The Court typically frowns on plaintiffs who supply a bogus address for service, and I suspect the reason Patrick is reluctant to move his idiotic action forward is that he's well aware that, the instant he tried, I would insist that he provide the Court with a valid and proper address where he could be served. This issue is suddenly more relevant given that Patrick seems to have relocated back to Lloydminster and is living at Casa Ross, and I'm sure he really doesn't want the Court to know that. Which is exactly why I want to confirm that one way or the other.

In short, my speculation is that if Patrick has moved back to the Lloyd, he really doesn't want that to become public knowledge as it would make it easier to serve legal papers on him. Hence, why I'm asking my long-suffering followers to keep their eyes open -- especially those in Lloydminster who might see him around town, perhaps at his regular haunts like the Canadian Brewhouse.

Anyway, if there are any sightings of Patrick, either leave a comment or drop me an email at canadiancynic@yahoo.ca. Thank you kindly.

P.S. Patrick really needs some better head shots for his YouTube videos:

 

 

P.P.S. It occurs to me that I recall there were other parties who were trying to serve Patrick with legal documents. If anyone is still trying to do that and is willing to make another attempt, why not try to serve him at Casa Ross? It seems pretty clear that someone is living there, and any attempt to serve Patrick at that address is guaranteed to be informative -- even if Patrick doesn't answer, whoever answers will have to disclose whether Patrick lives there, or insist that he doesn't. Either way, that's useful information.