Tuesday, August 07, 2012

This is the way a lawsuit ends ... not with a bang but a whimper.

Final update as of December 4, 2012: Submitted without comment.

(UPDATE, AUG 11: Scroll to bottom.)

I've tried to stay above this fray and let the legal proceedings properly play themselves out, but I've become increasingly irritated with the asinine misinformation that's currently being spewed by a couple dimwits who should know better, so while I will do my best to remain mature about this, I'm going to  emphatically correct the record.  And at the end of this post, I'll have homework for you, so stick around.

If you have no idea what this is all about, this will hit the highlights, and way more detail can be found in the most recent posts at this very blog.  I have no intention of being tediously repetitive, but I'll make sure there's no confusion about what we're discussing here; that is, that mouthy U of Alberta frat boi Patrick "Kid Cash Thunderbolt Nexus of Assholery" Ross, in late 2010, was found to have defamed me (maliciously so, I might add), to the extent that I was awarded $75,000 in general damages and an additional $10,000 in costs by the Ontario Superior Court of Justice.

Now, just to dampen the suspense, let me assure you that that judgment (long since registered in Patrick Ross' home province of Alberta for the purpose of enforcement) is still in effect, so absolutely nothing has changed with respect to the fact that Patrick Ross now owes me around $90,000, but that's not why we're here.  No, let's talk about that annoying misinformation.

First, there's the rumour (perpetrated by someone who should know better) that since this was a "default" judgment -- given that Patrick Ross, for whatever reason, chose not to file a defence -- my Statement of Claim was never judged on its "merits," and that I was somehow gifted with this judgment just by having my lawyer show up in court.  This is rubbish.

This bit of idiocy was first proposed by an online personality who goes by the handle of "Marky Mark", whose nad-grinding, thigh-sucking ignorance of simple Canadian law is made even more astonishing by the fact that he is apparently an actual practicing lawyer.  Early in this process, many, many educated people attempted to explain the concept of a "default judgment" to Marky, apparently to no avail, perhaps leaving readers back then with the impression that I just massively lucked out.  If you don't understand what nonsense this is, feel free to chat with someone who has a proper legal education, and I'm sure they will set you straight as I'm not inclined to spend the time doing that.  The judgment -- as you can read -- was unambiguous: I was not only defamed, but I was defamed maliciously.  So saith the Ontario Superior Court of  Justice.  End of discussion.  But we're not done here.  Back to the misinformation.

Unbelievably, even more idiotic misinformation was disseminated by the aforementioned Marky Mark -- to wit, that I, being the dastardly successful businessman that I am, had taken advantage of a naive, unprepared university undergraduate who was simply overwhelmed by the "complexities" of the Canadian legal system.  Let me put that myth to rest, if I may.

It's actually easily discoverable on the Intertoobz that, at the time of this writing, malicious defamer Patrick Ross is 31 years old, by which one can easily deduce that he was, at the very least, in his late 20s when he began his online campaign of blatant defamation against me, so trying to dismiss Patrick Ross' online smears of me as some sort of youthful indiscretion doesn't really hold up.  Add to that that it wasn't just a single libel of me, but month after month after relentless month of accusations of my criminality.  (When my lawyer finally served Blogger Support with the judgment to facilitate the removal of any and all blog posts of Patrick's referring to me, there were well in excess of 200 of them.  I leave it to the reader to judge the creepy obsessiveness of Patrick's smear campaign.)

As for Marky Mark's plaintive lament that Patrick Ross was somehow blindsided by the "complexities" of the legal system, well, hello, that's what lawyers are for, which is why I hired one -- because I am not an idiot.  Patrick Ross, on the other hand, lost no opportunity to publicly brag about his dizzying legal intellect and how, with his years of undergraduate education, he was, all by his lonesome, going to thrash me soundly in a court of law.  At which point he failed to file a Statement of Defence and, in short, it ended badly for him.  So to paint Patrick Ross as a dimwitted young'un who had no idea what he was getting into, well, that scenario falls apart pretty quickly.  But we're not done here.  Oh no, not yet.

As anyone who has been following this sordid saga knows, I have spent the last year and a half chasing Patrick Ross around Alberta in order to enforce this judgment, and Patrick has made it anything but easy.  I'm not going to get into details of the legal pleadings that have gone back and forth, but since it's in the public record if one would but look, I feel safe in mentioning that Patrick, because of his stupidity or intransigence, now owes me another $2,000+ in court costs for simply failing to obey the Court's instructions, and he has been found in Contempt of Court once already.  But that's not the capper.

The most egregious misrepresentation recently is Patrick Ross' public bragging that he has (in some unexplained and mysterious way) checked with a lawyer, and has been told that he doesn't need to pay me.  Let me assure you that that boasting comes as a complete surprise to my lawyer and myself, since neither of us have any idea what sort of legal wizardry would lead one to that conclusion.  Let me recap:  I was awarded a default judgment in November of 2010, and Patrick Ross has spent the time since then knowing fully the details of that judgment, and doing absolutely nothing about it.  If you don't understand the consequences of what I just wrote, I suggest you ask a lawyer buddy.  And there's one more point.

On at least one occasion, Patrick Ross has publicly promised that he has absolutely no intention of paying a penny of this judgment.  (And as of right now, that's precisely what he's paid -- not a penny.)  Patrick's position is that this judgment is terribly, terribly unfair and expensive, which is a fairly novel legal defence.  However, Patrick's personal outrage aside, I can once again assure you that the judgment is solidly intact, and it's not going anywhere, so until Patrick can come up with what he owes me, his life is going to be fairly uncomfortable as this judgment will follow him wherever he goes.  And here's your homework assignment.

Rumour has it that Patrick might be relocating from Edmonton back to his home planet of Lloydminster, AB, and this is where you come in.  Since no one trusts Patrick to come clean about any new employment he gets, if you happen to run across Patrick and he has a new job and actual income, by all means, drop me a note at canadiancynic@yahoo.ca.  Since Patrick Ross has made it clear he's not going to deal with this judgment voluntarily, the only option I have left is to have the courts deal with it for me.

Once upon a time, Patrick Ross had more than enough chances to make this ugliness go away quietly, and he chose to double down each time and make things worse.  Patrick Ross made his bed, then proceeded to shit in it over and over and over; now he's complaining about the smell.  That's unfortunate, but it represents choices Patrick Ross made all on his own.

As of right now, Patrick Ross owes me in the neighbourhood of $90,000, and that amount is increasing by the day.  And I'm pretty sure Patrick refusing to pay it simply because he doesn't want to isn't going to end well for one of us.

So if you run into Patrick (Twitter: @OutlawTory) Ross, say hi, and ask him when he thinks he's going to start paying up.  Because not paying is simply not an option.

P.S.  While I'm going to leave the comments section open, I will absolutely not tolerate anyone attempting to retry this case.  It's over, I have my judgment and that's the end of it.  If you want to argue about the legal machinations and why you disagree with them, take it elsewhere.  I'm just not interested.

UPPITY DATE (AUG 11, 2012): Yesterday was a rather amusing day in the Twitter-sphere, as numerous excitable folk piled on malicious defamer Patrick Ross for, well, being so stupid and/or incompetent and/or arrogant as to have never filed a Statement of Defence in the legal action under discussion.  Patrick's excuse for this devastating oversight was so eye-rollingly disingenuous that it needs to have its panties yanked down and spanked in public.  (Nothing here is going to be new information, I will just be summarizing what's already out there in the public domain.)

As I once explained here, Patrick Ross was given oodles and heaps and loads of time to properly file his defence.  Given that an inter-provincial Statement of Claim allows the respondent 40 days for such a filing, my lawyer was more than generous in giving Ross a full three months to get his ducks in a row and whip something up that the Court would find acceptable.  After those three months, and not having heard a peep from said respondent during the last month of that, my Ontario lawyer gave up and properly filed to place Patrick Ross in default and the rest, as they say, is legal history.

As you can read at that link above, Patrick Ross claims that he did file a defence, but openly admits that he did it incorrectly and (as is his pattern) currently blames someone else -- "incorrect instructions from a court clerk."  As I have explained and documented before, after dicking around and wasting everyone's time, Patrick Ross was given a hard deadline of September 15, 2010 to file a defence.  And as you can see, in a demonstration of stupefying bone-headedness, Patrick Ross apparently chose to wait until that very last day to make the attempt, guaranteeing that if anything at all went wrong, he would be totally and utterly screwed.  But wait ... there's more.

Once Patrick Ross learned of his colossal fuck-up, the obvious reaction from a sane human being would normally be to scramble to try to set things right, and file (properly, perhaps with the assistance of an actual lawyer) to overturn ASAP.  And as you can read from that earlier link, Patrick Ross chose not to do that.  Rather, he chose to simply disappear from view without making the slightest attempt to salvage the situation.  Again, that was Patrick's self-represented choice, and a colossally stupid one it was.  But here's the capper.

During all of this, since the very beginning in early 2010 when Patrick Ross was served with a Notice of Libel, Patrick chose not to hire a lawyer, which was his right.  And in all that time, Patrick Ross bragged publicly to one and all about his razor-sharp legal mind, suggesting he didn't need a lawyer.  But here's the thing -- if you choose to forego educated and competent legal counsel, you don't then get to complain about how badly things went because you got "incorrect instructions from a court clerk."  It doesn't work that way.

Put more succinctly, if you choose to represent yourself in court, you really shouldn't then complain about getting unbelievably stupid legal advice.

P.S.  And I notice practicing lawyer and attention whore "Marky Mark" is still carrying Patrick Ross' water.  And, yes, that's a euphemism.  And we may not be done with "Marky Mark" here.

P.P.S. While this might seem like piling on unnecessarily, a couple more observations would appear to be in order.  First, despite Patrick Ross' open admission that he's been aware of this default judgment for well over a year, he has never filed to overturn, despite promising to do so on a number of occasions.

In addition, both of my lawyers -- the Ontario lawyer who won my judgment, and the Alberta lawyer who is representing me in the enforcement proceedings -- have, on my instruction, strongly encouraged Patrick Ross to hire a lawyer to represent him.  To this day, he does not appear to have taken that advice, with unsurprising results.

If more misinformation continues to be spewed, I will deal with it appropriately.

Sunday, March 11, 2012

"The court hereby orders ..."

It has been brought to my attention that malicious defamer and $85,000 (default judgment) man Patrick Ross is currently crowing about how his recent ordered appearance in a Calgary courtroom represents some sort of victory for him.

I am deliberately not going to get into the detail of the resulting order, but I can assure you I'm satisfied with what went down and I'm going to leave it at that for now. When it's safe to tell you more, I'll do just that.

P.S. To no one's surprise, no "crimes" were reported at that hearing. But I figure you'd already guessed that.

Wednesday, March 07, 2012

Patrick Ross versus the legal system.

Since I had been giving readers a regular countdown to malicious defamer Patrick Ross' required March 6 appearance in a Calgary courtroom, it now behooves me to describe (for the most part) what happened yesterday, as explained to me over the phone by my Calgary lawyer. There are a few parts still waiting on clarification, but I'll fill those in when they come in. For now, I'm going to stick to the simple facts with a minimum of editorializing.

To set the stage, you should read Patrick Ross' recent heart-tugging plea for sympathy, and decide how seriously you want to take it. You should then follow that up with my earlier, brief discussion of what happened. And now, to complete the story as best I can while still waiting for the judge's official endorsement.

First, as you can see from my earlier post, Patrick Ross simply lied in court on two fundamental points. And despite the fact that my lawyer had incontrovertible evidence in the way of affidavits and screenshots, the judge inexplicably chose to give Patrick Ross the benefit of the doubt. However, this is only a minor annoyance as he can only play that card once; it will never work again.

The consequence of the above is that Patrick Ross now has an equally inexplicably generous 45 days to fill out and return the required Statement of Debtor Form. Again, a minor annoyance since this allows Patrick Ross to drag out these proceedings even further. However, since he has already demonstrated that he is perfectly comfortable lying in court, we will be fact-checking that Statement of Debtor Form very carefully indeed. In short, the next hard deadline is 45 days from yesterday, at which time Patrick Ross must have produced a completed Statement of Debtor Form, or he will be required once again to appear in a Calgary courtroom to explain why he should not be found in contempt of court. But there's one more thing that is a bit puzzling.

As explained to me by my lawyer (and it's entirely possible I'm misinterpreting what he said), the judge decreed that Patrick Ross would have the right to file to overturn the default judgment. Which sounds like a victory for Patrick, except for the following.

He has always had that right.

Nothing has ever stopped Patrick from filing a motion to overturn the judgment. In fact, Patrick himself publicly announced last year that he was in the process of doing just that, and even posted a copy of the motion he had prepared, only to be told that he couldn't file it remotely as he was trying to do. Rather, if Patrick Ross wants to file to overturn the judgment, that must (as I have been told) be done here in Ontario where the judgment was awarded, and must be done either by Patrick personally or by an Ontario lawyer he hires to represent him.

If this is indeed the case (as I believe it is, until shown otherwise), then it's not at all clear what that Calgary judge was going on about. As long as I understand this properly, Patrick can file a motion to overturn whenever he wants, with or without the blessing of that apparently misinformed judge. And whether that motion is successful will be determined here in Ontario, mercifully without her input. I'm still waiting for clarification on what exactly the judge was saying, and when I get it, I'll let you know.

In short, Patrick Ross appeared in a Calgary courtroom yesterday and, from this point on, he has no excuses left. He has 45 days to complete and submit a Statement of Debtor Form listing all his worldly assets, and if he tries to overturn the judgment, he will either have to travel to Ontario, or (finally) hire a lawyer to represent him. At the moment, nothing about the judgment has changed, and he still owes me $85,000 plus accruing costs.

More later as it arrives.

Tuesday, March 06, 2012

Well, this is an interesting development.

I refer, of course, to this. And while I wait for my lawyer to see how I should respond, I will comment on one aspect that should be safe since it's in the public record.

I refer to this claim by Patrick Ross:

This was a judgement which, by the way, I still have yet to ever actually see. Despite the fact that I have asked for it to be shared with me. And at the point this blogpost was written, I had yet to hear so much as a murmur from the plaintiff's counsel regarding this matter. Nor did I hear so much as a murmur from the plaintiff's counsel for months after.

I now refer the reader to Google Docs here, specifically page 15 of that collection of documents, where one can read the affidavit of one Darren Campbell, process server, swearing that he did in fact personally serve one Patrick Ross on April 29, 2011 with a true copy of the original order.

And I will leave it at that for now.

P.S. The Patrick Ross currently painting himself as crushingly depressed, unproductive and emotionally incapacitated for so long is the same Patrick Ross who still managed to drag himself to his computer and maliciously defame me day after day, week after week and month after month. I don't buy this bullshit for a second. And neither should you.

: I feel at liberty to post at least the following. In court, and under oath, Patrick Ross claimed that:

  • He had never received a copy of the original November, 2010 judgment, and

  • He had never received a Statement of Debtor Form to fill out.

In order to demonstrate the falsity of those two claims (again, made under oath in a court of law), I refer the reader to the following set of legal documents, where one can read:

  • With respect to the first claim, I direct the reader to p. 15, an affidavit showing personal service of the judgment on Patrick Ross by one Darren Campbell on April 29, 2011, and

  • on that same page, proof of service of a Statement of Debtor Form by the same server on the same date.

In addition, I draw the reader's attention to pp. 12-13 of the same set of documents, showing e-mail correspondence in which Patrick Ross claims to have already mailed in the same Statement of Debtor Form he now denies ever having received.

Inexplicably, the judge chose to believe Patrick Ross rather than the affidavits supplied by my lawyer, the end result being that things will be delayed slightly but no real harm done.

Monday, March 05, 2012

Patrick Ross, and one more sleep.

Yes, it's only one more sleep until malicious defamer and $85,000 (in debt to me) man Patrick Ross is scheduled to appear in a Calgary courtroom to explain himself, and his intransigence, and his dodging and evading, and his ignoring of proper legal service over the last several months, to a judge who will probably have little patience wth Patrick Ross wanting to lecture him on the intricacies of the Canadian legal system, LOL, OMFG, ROTFL!!!! (Inside joke there -- some of you know exactly what I'm talking about.)

This is all going down 10:00 am, Tuesday, March 6, Calgary Court Centre, 601 - 5 Ave SW, so if you're bored and want to see someone possibly make a complete and utter prat of themselves, drop by. I won't be there but, unsurprisingly, I will be represented by competent and able counsel -- something Patrick Ross has apparently never considered, which is probably why he now owes me over $85,000. (Those who understand the meaning of "default judgment" will understand the level of stupidity we're talking about here.)

And for those of you with a legal bent, you can read the appropriate docs here. I would draw your attention to the phrase "SUBSTITUTIONAL SERVICE", which means that Patrick Ross will not be able to claim shocked, wide-eyed ignorance of service as he has done before. (And besides, given how Patrick has publicly bragged about how he's "looking forward" to this, it would be a wee bit difficult to walk that back now.)

So, as I said, one more sleep. Stop back later, I may have updates.

UPDATE 1: It's a bit baffling for Patrick Ross to claim, as he does in the comment linked to above, that he is going to take the opportunity of his March 6 Calgary court appearance to "report a crime." One wonders what he's referring to, and how he plans to do that.

If Patrick thinks he will be given any latitude tomorrow to wax indignant about whatever indignantizes him, he will be one sorry puppy. Tomorrow's court appearance for Patrick will not be a pleasant one. He is being called in to be lectured to. Because he has behaved very badly. And treated the Court with smug and arrogant disdain. And, mostly, because he hasn't done any of what the November 2010 judgment against him ordered him to do. In short, no one is going to be terribly interested in what Patrick Ross has to say. But wait, there's more.

If Patrick Ross thinks he's just going to repeat the same accusations against me that got him in this $85,000 hole he's in, well, that's not only probably a bad idea, but someone should explain to Patrick the concept of "statute of limitations." And if that's not enough, while I am not a lawyer, here's what seems the strangest to me.

Does Patrick really think he's going to report a "crime"? Because my judgment against Patrick is a civil judgment, not criminal. So if Patrick thinks he's going to return the favour by somehow suing me similarly, he should probably be more careful with his terminology. Unless Patrick seriously plans to go to the police station, and have me charged with an actual "crime," at which point even more people will undoubtedly have to explain to him how the law works.

Anyway, one more sleep. If you have the time tomorrow morning, feel free to pop down to the Calgary Courthouse and see what happens. Take notes. And let me know how it turns out.

Tuesday, February 21, 2012

The hunt for Patrick Ross: Yeah, it's on.

(UPDATE, Saturday, Feb 25: Even though Patrick Ross has publicly announced (probably stupidly, but that's par for the course) that he is "looking forward" to his March 6 court date in Calgary, he appears to think this will be the appropriate venue to "report a crime." If Patrick thinks this required appearance will be the appropriate forum to air a laundry list of old and irrelevant grievances, I suspect he will be sorely disappointed.

Oh, and given that he has now openly and publicly bragged about how much he anticipates this court appearance, if he mysteriously doesn't show, things are going to go very badly for him indeed. If you run into him before March 6, you might want to point that out.

I realize this might be getting repetitive but, as hard as it might be to believe, my lawyers are still looking for malicious defamer Patrick Ross, who by now is into me for over $90,000, and that number continues to climb.

(Aside: Currently, this is the state of things -- Patrick Ross has been told to appear in a Calgary court on Tuesday, March 6. And he apparently has a very bizarre idea of what will happen there, as you can read below.)

Patrick Ross continues to be elusive, apparently simply because he is such a vacuous, unaccomplished nobody that he's never really left his mark anywhere, and probably just drifts from one frat brother's basement to another, slamming back Coors Light and shrieking at the television whenever professional wrestling comes on.

In any event, since all of the sordid details of this case have been covered in earlier posts, I'm going to keep it short, and tell you everything I can about Patrick Ross, and you will in turn drop me an e-mail at canadiancynic@yahoo.ca and tell me where he lives. Yeah, that's how it's going to play out.

So without further ado, what we think we know about Patrick Ross:

And, finally, here's an undated photo of Patrick Ross, accompanied by someone I can only guess is his date:

Getting an actual residence address for Patrick Ross would be splendid, but even if you don't know that, there are a few things that would be useful to know:

  • Is Patrick Ross still a student at the University of Alberta? Have you seen him around there recently? Where? (His Facebook page suggests he goes to the gym regularly. The campus gym?)

  • If he is still a student, what is his field of study? What year is he in? What courses is he taking?

  • Is he a member of any organization that meets on a regular basis at which he can be served legally?

  • Do you know what he does for a living? Does he currently have a job? Where?

I think you get the idea. Even if you can't pinpoint Patrick Ross for us, the more we know about him, the better. And feel free to check back here on a regular basis over the next couple of weeks. As I get more information, I'll post it here to help you along.

P.S. I just got off the phone with a private investigator who's ready and willing to smoke Patrick Ross out of whatever spidey hole he's hiding in. But I figure I'll take a few days and crowdsource this first to see what happens. Don't let me down.

UPPITY DATE: In a recent comment on his own blog, fugitive Patrick Ross seems to suggest he is totally ready for his court date in Calgary on March 6:

However, it's not at all clear he knows what he should be preparing for. Patrick appears to be under the delusion that he will, in some bizarre way, be given free rein to expound on my general badness as a person, or something equally baffling.

This would be a mistake.

As you can probably read from the linked-to legal documents above, Patrick Ross is being ordered to appear because he's been ignoring properly-served legal documents for some months now. And if he thinks this upcoming court date is his opportunity to get up on a soapbox and wax indignant over the way he thinks he's been treated, I suspect he is in for a very unpleasant time. But that's just a guess.

P.P.S. If you know Patrick Ross personally and happen to run into him in the next few days, you should tell him that he really needs to get a lawyer. A good deal of Patrick's current trouble stems from the fact that he believed he could handle all of this on his own (being the self-taught legal beagle that he thinks he is), and we can see just where that got him.

So if you bump into Patrick, for the love of God, advise him that he needs help. In more ways than one.

Thursday, February 16, 2012

The beginning of the end for Patrick Ross.

To truly appreciate what's about to go down here, you need to spend a few minutes reading the multi-part leadup to this in the earlier posts on this blog. So just kick back, crack open a cold one, and bring yourself up to speed, because you really need that background for what's about to happen, and there will be homework when this is over. Yes, you're going to work for your entertainment value.

Time passes ...

Disclaimer: I'm going to repeat as faithfully as possible what my Alberta lawyer told me but, in some places, I'll just speculate as to what things mean and people who know more about the legal system in Alberta are welcome to leave comments filling in the blanks. And now, to business.

As you now understand, one Patrick Ross of both Lloydminster and Edmonton currently owes me well over $85,000 for having maliciously defamed me online, and also for being too stupid and arrogant to even attempt to defend himself in court against a properly served Statement of Claim. You rarely see that level of dumbassitude, so appreciate the opportunity.

In any event, as you should have read, Patrick Ross has, for the last several months -- even after being personally served with a default judgment against him and a demand to turn in a completed Statement of Debtor Form listing his assets -- been dodging and weaving from his legal obligations, to the point where he recently actually started bragging online about how clever he is at having outwitted the legal system (as well as your humble scribe).

That was a mistake.

For someone who constantly presented himself as a super-duper, crack legal wizard, Patrick Ross never seemed to understand that this was seriously grown-up stuff he was screwing with, and that I had hired seriously grown-up people to handle it for me. Patrick's legal advice, on the other hand, appeared to come from the frat bois he watched Oilers games and professional wresting with. But that's neither here nor there.

What's important is that I have patiently bided my time to let Patrick Ross dig himself the deepest hole imaginable. And now I'm going to bury him in it, but not before taking his stuff first. Possibly all of it.

Behold, I give you: the smackdown.

I will make a long story short -- the court has had quite enough of Patrick Ross' smirking arrogance and contemptuous disdain and would appreciate it if he showed up in court to explain himself. And, oh, he can bring that completed Statement of Debtor Form with him while he's at it.

You will notice that the first date listed is March 6, at which point it would really be in Patrick Ross' best interests for him (or whatever lawyer he manages to sweet talk into representing him) to show up in Calgary at the appointed time and place. (Remember the date of March 6 -- you'll need it later.)

And here's where I have to speculate just a bit.

There are a number of possibilities for what might happen on March 6. The first is that Patrick Ross takes a day off and, at his own expense, drags his flabby ass from Edmonton down to Calgary, at which point I am told that a judge will be more than happy to have a chat with him. And it will not be a pleasant chat for Patrick.

As I understand it, this will not be a two-way dialogue. Oh, no, it will be very much unidirectional, where the judge will talk and Patrick Ross will listen. And if Patrick tries to interrupt, he will be told in no uncertain terms that no one gives a shit what he thinks. In any case, if Patrick shows up, it will be more than a little unpleasant for him.

The second option is that Patrick has the brains God gave a urinal deodorizer disc and (finally) gets himself a lawyer to represent him. This will save him the trouble of having to appear in person, but the end result won't be a whole lot different. His lawyer will be told in plain language just how fucked Patrick is and, by the way, where's that Statement of Debtor Form? In both of these cases, Patrick is now going to be on a tight, court-ordered schedule. And the third option?

Oh, dear.

Given Patrick Ross' history, it would surprise no one if he didn't take this substitutional service seriously and blew off his requested court appearance for an evening sucking back beers with his frat buddies. And here's how I believe that would play out. (I'm willing to be corrected -- that's what the comments section is for.)

If my lawyer shows up in court on March 6, and there is no sniff of Patrick Ross or a corresponding lawyer, we will file to hold him in contempt of court. And depending on how things play out, if Patrick Ross continues to not take this seriously, well, the phrase "warrant for his arrest" came up in the conversation with my lawyer earlier today. At which point, being arrested would probably curtail a bucketload of career opportunities for boy lawyer Patrick Ross. But I'm getting ahead of myself.

Getting back to the service, the next magic date is March 6, at which point it would be spectacularly unwise of Patrick Ross to make no appearance whatever in Calgary. And if he doesn't, we'll be going after that contempt of court charge. But to guarantee that application, we'll probably have to serve him personally, and that's where you, my adoring fans, come in.

I want to know where Patrick Ross lives, and I want to know by March 6, when my lawyer shows up in court.

Knowing where to lay actual hands on defendant Patrick Ross will make serving him with contempt of court charges a trivial no-brainer, so that's your first homework task -- bring me the meatspace co-ordinates of yammering wingnut and defendant Patrick Ross. But wait -- there's more.

We want to make sure that Patrick Ross can't possibly claim that he's unaware of what's happening, so in addition to the recently-granted substitutional service, I am going to crowdsource notifying him of it. That's right, I would like as many people as possible to casually drop Patrick Ross a note, or e-mail, or tweet, or Facebook message, and leave a link to this blog post, to the point where he can barely move under the weight of people laughing at him and pointing him to this post.

When March 6 comes and my lawyer appears in a Calgary courtroom, I want him to be able to say that no human being alive could have missed the coast-to-coast ridicule of Patrick Ross, based on how many folks gleefully pointed out to him how thoroughly fucked he is. And here are your options:

  • Email him at his well-known email address, ddp316@hotmail.com

  • Drop him a tweet at his (new and) gloriously appropriate Twitter handle, "@OutlawTory"

  • Hop over to his (new) blog, http://badcompanycanada.blogspot.com, and leave a comment for him

  • Write on the wall of his Facebook page

Yes, the possibilities are (almost) endless -- the point is that, between now and March 6, we want incontrovertible proof that Patrick Ross could not possibly be unaware of what's happening to him. But don't stop there.

Since Patrick has a childish tendency of pretending none of this is happening, if you do something like send him a Tweet and he responds to it, or you leave a comment at his blog and he replies to it, take a screenshot. We'll want proof. I hear judges love proof.

Anyway, I think you have a pretty good idea of what I'm after. First, I want to know where a process server can physically lay hands on evasive defendant Patrick Ross for the purpose of serving him with contempt of court if it comes to that. And in the meantime, take a minute and drop him a note. Point him to this blog post. Take a screenshot and, for now, hang onto it and if I need it, I'll let you know.

That should do for now. I'm sure there's so much I'm forgetting, but have fun in the comments section and if I need to clarify anything, I can do that.

And ... go.

(Aside: Any delightful hints as to where to find Patrick Ross can be sent to me at canadiancynic@yahoo.ca)

UPDATE THE FIRST: Some folks might be curious about the claim that Patrick Ross owes me "well over" $85,000 by now. Let me explain.

In addition to that symbolic 2 per cent per annum that's been accumulating since November of 2010, I have been assured by my lawyer that I have the right to claim all of my additional legal costs involved with chasing Patrick Ross, particularly including my lawyer's time in working with Google/Blogger to cleanse Patrick's sewer pipe of a blog of the defamation that was the entire basis of this suit. So it's safe to say we're looking at a total bill that is noticeably north of $90,000 by now, and it's just going up with every passing day.

And if Patrick thinks he's been devilishly clever in having avoided the process server all this time, well, any money I've spent running after him is going to be added to his bill in the final reckoning. Not looking so clever anymore, is he?

UPDATE THE SECOND: Occasionally, someone asks how it can be so hard simply locating a loud-mouthed, self-absorbed wanker like U of Alberta frat boi Patrick Ross. An excellent question. After all, he's certainly not shy about blogging and tweeting and in general yapping up a storm online these days, where he is apparently always the smartest guy in the room and everyone else is a LOL, OMFG, ROTFLMAO idiot. But I digress. Onward.

The problem appears to be that, apart from Patrick Ross' monumentally offensive and demeaning presence online, he has, at the atypically advanced age of 30 for a university undergrad, accomplished absolutely nothing in his life of any significance whatsoever.

If one had, say, started a business, or owned a home, or was deeply involved in community events of some kind, it would normally be pathetically easy to track them down. Once someone's put down roots in society, they become fairly easy to locate, don't you think?

In Patrick's case, however, it would appear that he has drifted through 30 years on this planet, and has absolutely nothing to show for it. Apart from a totally worthless blog and a monumentally vacuous Twitter account, Patrick Ross has left no traces. He is, quite simply, the intangible man, whose absence would cause barely a ripple in anyone's pond.

And there's the difficulty -- it's not easy to find someone whose total effect on society in general is pretty much zero. But we're trying. So feel free to help out. I recommend Oilers games and any sports bar that broadcasts professional wrestling.

UPDATE THE THIRD: And speaking of law enforcement ...

At the moment, as you can see, Patrick Ross is still not technically in contempt of court and there is not yet a warrant for his arrest, so there's no reason for the law to get involved.

But it occurs to me that if you happen to be, say, a member of the RCMP in Alberta, or the provincial police, or Edmonton city police, and you feel like helping out, and just happen to be near a computer with a few minutes to kill, and you just happen to slip and type the name "Patrick Ross" and accidentally see where he lives, well, far be it from me to look a gift horse in the mouth.

"But wait," you wail girlishly like Ezra Levant, "that's ... that's ... UNETHICAL!"

Like I give a crap.

Appreciate the irony of the Harper Government currently wanting to spy on you without a warrant, then feel free to lecture me on my lack of ethics. Go ahead. I'm waiting to be judged.

In the meantime, if you're sitting next to one of those handy police computers and it just happens to give you some terrifically useful information about Patrick Ross, well, I won't tell anyone if you won't.

UPDATE THE FOURTH: While this update has no effect on the eventual enforcement of the judgment, its entertainment value is off the charts. (And while you're keeping up with regular developments, never forget that the goal here is to determine the physical location of one Patrick Ross before March 6. Just a friendly reminder. Now, back to business.)

As you're now aware (or at least should be), U of Alberta frat boi and perpetual yammering Internet troll Patrick Ross was dumb enough to maliciously defame me, ignore repeated requests to stop, mock a Notice of Libel, then blow off a properly-served Statement of Claim, at which point my lawyer quite reasonably filed to put him in default, at which point Patrick Ross was not invited to the rest of the legal proceedings where my lawyer presented my case, whereupon the judge decided that the level of aforementioned malicious defamation entitled me to $75,000 in damages and another $10,000 in court costs. But here comes the entertainment value.

There is absolutely no doubt that Patrick Ross was aware of this judgment almost immediately after it was awarded back on November 23, 2010. However, rather than frantically try to salvage the situation, Patrick made the bizarre decision to go underground, apparently believing that if I couldn't see him, I would forget about him.

Um ... not likely.

Eventually, however, it must have dawned on Patrick that he was only delaying the inevitable nad-crushing legal smackdown, and decided that the proper strategy was to (wait for it) counter-sue! For defamation! Yes, that was the best idea to percolate in the brain of boy lawyer Patrick Ross, who must have thought that if he could somehow even things out, he'd be off the hook. Whereupon Patrick Ross came up with ... this.

I am not joking.

After deranged Internet loon Patrick Ross had published well over 200 blog posts attacking your humble scribe, he apparently believed that what was contained in that attempt at a defamation counter-suit was going to even the score. (I direct your attention to the kind of monster I am, where I would go out of my way to insult Patrick Ross on his birthday -- an interesting claim since I had no idea when that was.)

To the everlasting regret of the Canadian legal system, this document was never actually filed. It was, in fact, sent electronically to my Alberta lawyer, who took such pity on it that (with my blessing) it was returned to Patrick with the explanation that it was utterly unfit for filing but my lawyer was willing to help Patrick whip it into shape. Unsurprisingly, that was the last we saw of that "filing."

In any event, the clock is ticking, March 6 is coming up fast, and my lawyer and I are still hunting for Patrick Ross. Whether we find him or not will make absolutely no difference to the proceedings of March 6, but it will speed things up afterwards when we apply to have Patrick Ross, you know, arrested.

As always, stay tuned ... there's more to come.

P.S. Given how casually Patrick Ross describes almost everything he doesn't like as "malicious," I suspect he doesn't really understand the legal meaning of that word. But that's just a guess.

UPDATE THE FIFTH: Let's talk about default judgments.

To make a long story viciously short, I won what is referred to as a "default" judgment because defendant and convicted defamer Patrick Ross was too cement-headed to even file a defence after being served with a Statement of Claim. Given 40 days to respond to legal service, Patrick Ross apparently decided that he was too busy polishing his WWE collector replica championship belts to be distracted by something as tawdry as someone suing his ass off. But, as always, here comes the entertainment value.

Even after a default judgment has gone against you, it's entirely possible that it's because you were completely unaware of it. Didn't have a clue it was going on. It's happened. And there is, in fact, legal recourse for that. What you can do is, upon learning of your legal ass-kicking, file as quickly as possible to overturn the judgment. That's not an appeal; you can't do that. What you can do is simply ask to have the judgment set aside so you can jump back in and defend. You might still get your ass kicked, but at least you'll get the chance to tell your side of the story.

Ah, but there's a catch. There are conditions that need to be satisfied for a judge to look kindly on your request to overturn. Behold. As you can see, what is required is that once you learn of the judgment against you, you cannot waste any time and must hie thee hence to a judge with all possible speed. You must also have a good reason for not having defended and, finally, you have to show that you could at least put up a good defence.

And how does all this apply to Patrick Ross? I'm so glad you asked.

Having completely disappeared for months after the judgment was announced, Patrick Ross burst back onto the scene with a depressingly typical "LOL, OMFG, ROTFL" blog post, of which I reproduce the part so pants-pissingly relevant to this discussion:

I believe you see Patrick's problem here.

After hilariously admitting (publicly, I remind you) that he's been aware of the judgment all this time, Patrick goes on to minimize the damage as being only "a default judgement", claims that his filing a defence failed miserably due to his own incompetence, then mind-numbingly goes on to brag about how all that time hiding out and being patient is suddenly going to work in his favour.

The legal system will never realize what uproarious amusement it missed when Patrick Ross chose not to pursue this legal strategy, particularly since he would almost certainly have tried to represent himself in court.

Anyway, stay tuned as I'm sure there will be more.

UPDATE THE SIXTH: From the same March 30, 2011 blog post of Patrick Ross where he bafflingly brags about having avoided dealing with a default judgment for months, we have the following intellectual rabbit dropping:

For someone who puts on airs of being a self-made legal beagle, Patrick Ross seems utterly unfamiliar with the concept of "malicious prosecution." See, the way it works is that you might have grounds for suing someone for malicious prosecution if you yourself were sued, and you won. That last part is kind of important.

Let's let Wikipedia sum it up:

Malicious prosecution is a common law intentional tort, while like the tort of abuse of process, its elements include (1) intentionally (and maliciously) instituting and pursuing (or causing to be instituted or pursued) a legal action (civil or criminal) that is (2) brought without probable cause and (3) dismissed in favor of the victim of the malicious prosecution.

Yeah, it's that last part that's pretty important (and the other parts too, of course). And this is the stand Patrick Ross is going to make?

I don't think so.

Given that the suit against him was more than adequately merited, that he chose to not file a defence and that, yes, he had his ass handed to him on a hubcap to the tune of $85,000, it's not at all clear where he thinks he's going to get a malicious prosecution case out of this.

Ah, but this is boy lawyer Patrick Ross, for which the law apparently works totally differently on his home planet. Good luck with that.

As always, stay tuned as the entertainment never ends ...

UPDATE THE SEVENTH: Still working from that same March 30, 2011 blog post, here's convicted malicious defamer Patrick Ross, weirdly suggesting that he's finally ready, willing and able to go to the mat:

Now, here's the problem with that.

Apparently, at that time, no one had properly explained to Patrick Ross that the case was over, and he lost. Reading the above, one gets the distinct impression that Patrick Ross has been biding his time and carefully preparing his rebuttal, for when he can spring it on me savagely and humiliate me in a court of law. A splendid idea ... if it weren't for the awkward detail that the case was decided months before in an Ottawa courtroom, where defaulted defendant Patrick Ross received a massive, legal boot to the nads and I was awarded a judgment large enough to stun a wildebeest. At that point, it was over, so it's not at all clear what Patrick Ross thinks he's preparing for.

As you, gentle reader, are now aware, Patrick Ross has been ordered by The Court, in no uncertain terms, to be present or be represented in a Calgary courtroom this coming March 6. And if Patrick Ross thinks this is his time to shine, and to retry this case in a legal setting where he can finally present his side of it, he is in for a world of ass-kicking discomfort. No one will be interested in his opinion so he should, as quickly as possible, disabuse himself of that notion.

On the other hand, the entertainment value would be incalculable. There's that, too.

UPDATE THE EIGHTH: Those of you with a legal background might be amused to learn that, to the best of my knowledge, at no time during these proceedings over the past two years has Patrick Ross ever retained a lawyer.

Feel free to let us know what you think about that in the comments section.

P.S. Just to make sure you appreciate how all this has played out, convicted defamer and soon-to-be indentured servant Patrick Ross 1) was served with a Notice of Libel (which he mocked), 2) was served with a Statement of Claim (which he ignored until reminded of it), 3) failed to properly file a statement of defence (later claiming he tried, then admitting that it was rejected due to his own incompetence), 4) learned of the default judgment, at which point, he went underground to escape accountability for his actions, 5) surfaced months later, bragging about how his disappearance somehow worked in his favour, 6) threatened all and sundry with legal actions months after it was too late, and 7) in general made such a contemptuous ass of himself that a judge was more than happy to allow us to serve him substitutionally for his upcoming March 6 court appearance in Calgary.

And in all this time, he never hired a lawyer. Feel free to opine on the wisdom of this strategy in the comments section.

UPDATE THE NINTH: In case you're a bit confused as to Patrick Ross' legal obligations right this minute, let me explain the concept of substitutional service, and why Patrick Ross might want to get himself a really good lawyer really quickly.

Normally, when one is serving a defendant with legal papers (as we are doing right this minute, compelling Patrick to appear in a Calgary courtroom at 10 AM on March 6), it's typically necessary to do that service in person, so that the court can be assured the defendant received the documents. Perfectly reasonable.

However, in this case, a judge in Calgary was recently convinced that Patrick Ross is such a weaselly douchebag (I'm paraphrasing here) that we were going to be allowed to serve him substitutionally. In Patrick's case, we have been told that emailing him a copy of the Notice of Application, plus leaving a physical copy at his parents' residence in Lloydminster, is entirely sufficient, and this is the part Patrick might want to pay close attention to since I'm fairly sure he's reading all this and not taking it all that seriously.

For quite some time, self-described legal wonder bunny Patrick Ross has believed that as long as he stays out of sight hiding in someone's basement, he's all right and can't possibly be held to account for his defamation. Which means that the concept of substitutional service is going to come to him as an exceedingly unpleasant surprise.

We want Patrick's meatspace co-ordinates by March 6 so that, if he fails to show, we can then serve him personally with a contempt of court order (or whatever the legal name is). We absolutely do not need his address for this current service. Once the Notice is 1) emailed, and 2) left at his parents' house, he's been served. Period. At which point he has been ordered to appear.

I direct your attention to the linked-to document above, page 6 (whose date has been revised to March 6) and to the following text:


This application is made against you. You are a respondent.

You have the right to state your side of this matter before the Justice.

To do so, you must be in Court when the application is heard as shown below:

So understand that, at this point, Patrick Ross has been served. Which is why I'm suggesting he chat with a lawyer ASAP, so that a lawyer can explain that to him in no uncertain terms. (You can read the WARNING at the end of that document on p. 9 as well, to truly appreciate how the Court is not fucking around here and is really out of patience.)

Once again, we don't need to find Patrick Ross for this service. He (or his lawyer) must appear in court in Calgary on March 6. If he does not, we will apply to have him held in contempt, whereupon if Patrick Ross thinks things weren't going well for him thus far, well, he has no idea how much worse it's about to get.

So if you're bored on the morning of March 6 and hanging out in Calgary, you're free to pop down to the courthouse. Regardless of whether or not Patrick shows up, it should be worth the time.

Saturday, January 21, 2012

The creepy eliminationism of Suzanne Fortin.

NOTE: You might want to check back on a regular basis for updates since this story is just getting more entertaining. Updates will be added at the bottom.

While I still have no intention of returning to blogging on any sort of regular basis, a recent blog post of Ottawa's most prominent fetus fetishist Suzanne Fortin can't go unspanked, not only for its jaw-dropping intellectual lunacy and murderous overtones, but its hypocrisy and downright dishonesty. And while most of the commenters there seem to be giving Suzanne the drubbing she deserves, I think they're missing a couple points that deserve a little more evisceration. And so, to work.

OH, DEAR: As commenter Fern predicted, Suzanne Fortin is such a dishonest hack, she redirected the link to her post to fetal porn -- you know, the horrific, bloody images that one suspects she masturbates to on a regular basis. So here's a screenshot of the text in question:

If you want to visit, copy and paste http://www.bigbluewave.ca/2012/01/pro-life-nation-launches.html into your browser.

First, let's reproduce the passage in question that's causing so much consternation:

Pro-life Nation's first project is the launching of a groundbreaking web site AbortionDocs.org. This site is a searchable database that endeavors to list every surgical abortion clinic, every "abortion pill-only" clinic, and every abortionist in the United States. The website boasts that it contains the largest collection of documents ever compiled on the abortion cartel-and is growing daily.

Documents include photos, medical license applications, malpractice suits, disciplinary records, news articles, videos, criminal histories, and more.

Now while Suzanne didn't personally write that passage, I think we can safely conclude she agrees with it whole-heartedly; otherwise, why the unconditional promotion? In any event, I think it's perfectly fair to suggest that we can thrash Suzanne soundly based on those words. And where to start?

To save time, let's all just agree that the suggestion she's making is utterly, totally and completely batshit fucking deranged. Given the historic (and, some would say, ironic) violence of the "pro-life" movement, it takes an astonishing level of intellectual damage to suggest that one could openly document all sorts of personal information about abortion providers without seeing the potential disaster therein. If you have no idea what I'm talking about here, then you're simply too stupid to be taking part in this discussion. But that's not why I'm here. Oh, no, there's more.

First, note carefully how desperately Suzanne tries to move the goalposts when she's called on her obvious genocidal obsession. Suzanne is adamant that she wants to document only those abortion providers that are criminals or who have "shady" behaviours, writing at one point in the comments section:

There are no "wanted" posters. It's a database of information for women who might want to abort. You know, because we tell them about shady abortionists when you won't.

Suzanne makes the same claim several more times -- that she's only interested in smoking out the "bad" abortionists -- the shady ones, the criminals, the drug addicts and so on. That is, of course, a total lie since one can clearly read in the original passage (emphasis tail-waggingly added):

This site is a searchable database that endeavors to list every surgical abortion clinic, every "abortion pill-only" clinic, and every abortionist in the United States.

So Suzanne's frantic attempt to deflect falls MASSIVELY flat, and that's her first lie. But that's not why I'm here. No, I have a personal dog in this fight.

Suzanne's other pathetic rationalization is that simply listing publicly everything one can learn about abortion providers in no way endangers them, no sirree, they just want to, um, "shame" them, yeah, that's the ticket. And if they're lawbreakers, sure, that's a bonus, but Suzanne insists that a MASSIVE public database of abortion docs and everything one can glean about them (including their photos) doesn't represent any sort of risk to them. In Suzanne's own words, "This is not violent." This is an interesting defense since it contradicts completely how Suzanne felt just a couple years ago.

At the risk of over-summarizing, long-time readers might recall my public spat with one "NAMBLA Dick", during which -- after NAMBLA Dick had created a web site whose sole purpose it was to push unsuspecting readers to the home page of NAMBLA, an organization that promoted pedophilia -- I suggested that one response would be to figure out where Dick's children went to school in order to warn the teachers and administrators there that one of their parents had a truly creepy obsession with men having sex with children.

No, it wasn't one of my finer moments, but here's the curious thing -- by simply making that suggestion, I was hysterically accused of putting Dick's kids in terrible and mortal danger. Really? In what way? I'd suggested that, based on nothing more than Dick's public home address, it would be geographically trivial to deduce where the neighbourhood school was, nothing more. And in the end, that idea simply faded away and nothing was ever done with it. To this day, I have no idea which school that was and I have no interest in ever finding out.

And yet ... and yet ... from one of Suzanne's own posts from a couple years back (no link since she'd just redirect it to more gratuitous fetal pornography), we have this gem:

The lowest tactic was when Cynic revealed information about Richard Evans' kids and where they went to school, exposing them to possible danger.

Well, isn't that special?

Let's first notice that Suzanne is once again lying outrageously (something she claims as a Christian never to do). There was no "revealing" of school information at any time, either by me or anyone else. It's a lie.

Ah, but that's not the best part of the above, and I'm sure you see where I'm going with this. Apparently, Suzanne believed that just by publishing a school location, I was exposing someone to "possible danger." That's fascinating since she seems to have reversed herself entirely since then, claiming now that posting everything one can determine about someone couldn't possibly end badly. Hypocrisy, thy name is Suzanne. But there's one more point that can be made.

Frankly, I think this whole thing is overblown. I doubt Suzanne is actually going to do anything like this since, even though she's clearly mentally disturbed, she probably still has the awareness to realize what sort of shitstorm she'd be walking into, legally.

Note how Suzanne writes:

We should do this in Canada...

As in, she thinks it's a terrific idea but one gets the impression she's more than happy to let someone else do the work. And that's a good idea, Suzanne, because here's the thing.

People get a bit touchy when you publicly accuse them of being "shady" or "criminals," and you've made it clear that's what you have in mind. But if you want to make those kinds of accusations, you better make sure you can back them up, because that sort of accusation is -- what's the word I'm after? oh, right -- "libelous." And you'll have to trust me on this -- publicly accusing someone of criminal behaviour on the Intertoobz has the potential for ending very badly.

So I'm guessing that while Suzanne would really, really like a public database of Canadian abortion docs, she's actually not going to do anything about it herself. Because I doubt there's enough money on the planet to cover the legal fees she'd need to pay if she tried.

In the end, though, one can just be amused by Suzanne's jaw-dropping hypocrisy and double standards, where publishing openly public information about someone represents "possible danger." Except when it doesn't.

P.S. I feel horrifically sorry for Suzanne's children. They're going to need a lifetime of therapy to cope with the psychological damage. Or they'll just go to work for Sun TV. No one will even notice.

AFTERSNARK 1: Suzanne has incredible difficulty keeping her story straight. After insisting she wants only to document the "bad" abortionists, she writes the following in her own comments section:

And suddenly, we're back to what Suzanne really wants -- a database of all abortion providers. It's actually sad that Suzanne can't keep track of her own dishonesty.

AFTERSNARK 2: Gosh, how did I miss this bit of hypocrisy from Suzanne:

Wow. So "There is no such thing as a right to privacy," except there was a couple years ago when simply talking about where someone went to school was "exposing them to possible danger." Suzanne really needs to decide if she's going to take the red pill or the blue pill. She'll still be a total crackpot, but at least she'll be a consistent one.

AFTERSNARK 3: Well, let's score one for Suzanne as she gets something right which has no value whatsoever. Here's a recent altercation over at Suzie Fetus':

And did I publish the names of Dick's kids, Courtney and Tyler? Why, yes ... yes, I did, because it was publicly available information on Dick's political web site when Dick was running for Calgary city council in Ward 4. I did not reveal anything; I simply reproduced what Dick had already put up on his web page for all to see, and Dick himself was nice enough to admit this in my comments section back in March of 2008, and I quote:

Well, isn't that special? Even Dick admits that I did nothing wrong, and yet Suzanne continues to tearfully clutch her pearls over something that represents no invasion of privacy whatever, even as she lectures everyone that we have no such right to privacy.

Suzanne should really figure out which argument she wants to defend, given how she bounces around all over the map. And she's still a lying sack of crap. If she thinks the name of a school was ever published by me or anyone else at my blog, she should provide a link. Or she should shut the fuck up and take down that accusation because that claim is still defamation and I'm rapidly running out of patience with liars.

P.S. Make sure you appreciate what sort of vile and reprehensible hypocrite and liar Suzanne Fortin is. On the one hand, she sees absolutely nothing even slightly unethical about publishing "photos, medical license applications, malpractice suits, disciplinary records, news articles, videos, criminal histories, and more" for abortion doctors, knowing full well the perpetual violence against such people because she claims there is no such thing as a right to privacy.

And yet, she gets her placenta in a knot over my printing two names that were openly and unabashedly published by the aforementioned Dick, who even admitted in public on my web site that he had "no problem" with that. So, Suzie, who's being the disgusting hypocrite here? I'm just asking.

AFTERSNARK 4: And it just gets better:

Oh, my ... Suzie Fetusfest appears to put a great deal of stock in manning up and admitting when one's made a mistake. One wonders when she's going to walk that road herself with this blatant lie about me:

As anyone who followed that ugliness knows by now, I did not "reveal" anything, and no school name was ever published, for the simple reason that I have no idea which school they attended, and I never did. In short, Suzanne Fortin is lying.

And I'm going to guess that Suzanne is going to correct the record never, since Suzanne is an astonishingly sanctimonious scold when it comes to others, but she lies freely when it suits her purposes. She really is a spectacularly dishonest hypocrite.

AFTERSNARK 5: Yeah, she went there:

Friday, January 06, 2012

Of rocks, and the slimy things hiding underneath -- the Patrick Ross saga.

Back here, Rev. Paperboy asks:

What sort of fun and games are going to ensue (no pun intended) when the proper rock is lifted and Patsy scuttles out into the daylight?

I am not a lawyer and I would prefer not to speculate so I'll recap and let others with the appropriate legal beagle expertise weigh in. What follows are the simple facts.

On, November 23, 2010, defendant and U of Alberta student Patrick Ross, having weirdly chosen to not defend himself against a properly-served Statement of Claim, was found guilty in an Ontario court not merely of defamation, but of "clearly malicious" defamation:

(This default judgment was apparently "unrecorded" "unreported" which is why it doesn't appear in the normal legal databases or online, but you're welcome to view a confirmation of the judgment here if you refuse to take my word for it.)

(Aside: Thanks to commenter Holly Stick for pointing out the typo above, and for the link to an explanation.)

As one can read, in addition to the whopping $85,000 (and accumulating) penalty levied against him, Patrick Ross was ordered to, within 15 days, remove all posts that "in any way" referred to me from his blog, the appropriately-named "Nexus of Assholery." Even though Patrick Ross was clearly aware of the judgment within hours of its posting that day, he did nothing.

After months of being elusive, Patrick Ross was finally located and personally served with a copy of the judgment on April 29, 2011:

which meant that, as I understand it, the 15-day deadline for Patrick Ross to take action finally started. But that's not all.

As you can see from that affidavit, malicious defamer Patrick Ross was simultaneously served with a Financial Statement of Debtor form, which requires him to list in agonizing detail his financial assets and liabilities. Conveniently, that form also has a hard, legal 15-day deadline to be filled and returned, implying of course that Patrick Ross had until mid-May of last year to both a) cleanse his blog of all posts referring to me in any way, and b) return an accurate and complete Statement of Debtor form to my lawyer in Alberta.

As of today, Jan 6, 2012 (some eight months later), malicious defamer Patrick Ross has done absolutely nothing in the way of fulfilling his legal obligations (even after proper and legal service). He has paid me nothing, and never removed a single one of the 200+ blog posts that were covered under the order of the judgment. (After being more than patient, I approached Blogger Support with a copy of the judgment and worked with them to remove all infringing posts. Those posts are now gone, no thanks to Patrick Ross.)

In addition, malicious defamer Patrick Ross has never filled in and returned the legally-required Financial Statement of Debtor form to my Alberta lawyer, despite having promised by e-mail to do so.

In short, despite having been personally and properly served in April of last year with both the judgment itself and the Statement of Debtor form (both of which had clearly-marked, 15-day legal deadlines), malicious defamer Patrick Ross has done nothing and, to this day, remains in hiding and refuses to reply to phone calls and e-mails from my lawyer. (At this point, I would normally make a joke about "Law and Order" conservatives always lecturing us about "accountability" and "personal responsibility" but I suspect that would just be cruel.)

Given the situation as I have described it, armchair lawyers are now free to speculate.

P.S. To answer a couple earlier questions, no, I am not returning to blogging. The only purpose of these recent posts is to try to bring the Patrick Ross issue to a close. Once he's located and dragged before a judge, I will finish things off with a report on how it went, and there will be single malt scotch for everyone, and that will be it.

And if you want to know how it ends, feel free to help locate Patrick Ross and turn him in so that it ends just a little bit sooner. :-)

P.P.S. Given how much effort Patrick Ross put into defaming and libeling me online and sullying my reputation, it would seem that turnabout is slowly becoming fair play.

P.P.P.S. I leave as an exercise for the reader to identify the pants-crapping irony here.

Wednesday, January 04, 2012

One man's defamation is another man's yappy douchebagitude.

One of my great regrets in life is that this action was never filed. I believe we are all the poorer for it.

Where's Twatsy? Tracking the elusive Patrick Rossosaurus.

If you've followed the six-part series, The Saga of Patrick Ross (A study in Pathological Douchebagitude), then it's time for you to show your appreciation for all that pants-peeing entertainment value by helping me, my lawyers and children and small animals everywhere to locate and spank Mr. Ross to the extent that the legal system will allow:

So here's what we know about Patrick Ross. First, this would be what we in the biz jovially refer to as "The Twatster" or "Twatsy" for short:

(I'm guessing the fetching creature draped all over him would be his date, which should be a warning to you youngsters everywhere of the danger of "roofies".)

This is a list of everything we're pretty sure we know about Patrick Ross:

In addition, Patrick Ross appears to be a regular contributor of right-wing ravings to a couple of useless online rags:

Finally, rumour has it that Patrick Ross is still a regular around the University of Alberta where he hangs out with campus conservatives and brags to cute undergrad chicks about his replica WWE championship belt and set of Edmonton Oilers collectable beer mugs.
What we're after is a reliable and verified address/location for Patrick Ross, so we can politely gift him with one more legal document, after which his running days are over. So drop any hints in the comments section, and me and my crack legal team of top men will take it from there.

UPPITY DATE: Oh, dear:

Twitmeister should really ask Patrick "Outlaw Tory" Ross whether Ross thinks his last 12 months have been "well played."

P.S. Just so you know ...

P.P.S. Here's the aforementioned Patrick Ross, doing his screen test for the part of a bookstore clerk while choking back the depression of knowing he owes me over $85,000 (his eminence bursts onto the screen at around 1:08):

The Saga of Patrick Ross -- Part the Sixth: Denouement

[Scroll to bottom for Dec 23, 2012 (and more recent) update.]

Part 1.
Part 2.
Part 3.
Part 4.
Part 5.

At this point, I think it's time to make one big push and wrap this up with a huge, ugly, Patrick Ross-flavoured bow, at which point you'll be getting your homework assignment. And you knew that was coming, so don't look surprised.

I suspect a number of readers are wondering, why the hell has this been taking so long? After all, the inordinately brief summary of the judgment from back in November of 2010 seems pretty clear on what Patrick Ross is required to do, and how quickly he's required to do it:

And here's where the novel property of a default judgment comes in.

Make no mistake -- the fact that Patrick Ross was so incompetent as to be unable to file a simple Statement of Defence within the legally-mandated deadline worked out MASSIVELY in my favour, allowing me to present my side of the case unopposed (although one imagines that even if Patrick Ross had filed and been present in court, I'm thinking he would have had a hard time defending his actions). But a default judgment also has an obvious downside.

As explained to me, the legal requirements of a default judgment kick in only after the judgment has been personally served on the victim, uh, defendant. If Patrick Ross had had the sense God gave a urinal deodorizer disc and hired a lawyer, this wouldn't be an issue. But the fact that Patrick Ross was in default meant that I had to find him after I won my judgment and serve him personally with a copy of that judgment before it would be considered in effect.

So let's make a long story short -- due to some miscommunications and also due to some astonishingly retarded U of Alberta frat brothers, it was April 29 of 2011 before a process server was able to put a copy of said judgment in Patrick Ross' pudgy hands, at which point the 15-day clock finally started ticking on his legal obligations to, among other things, get rid of every trace of any reference to me from his rancid sewer pipe of a blog. But that April 2011 service carried with it another time-critical obligation, as you can see here:

That would be the ominous "FINANCIAL STATEMENT OF DEBTOR" reference, which required Patrick Ross to list, in agonizing detail, every one of his assets, again with a 15-day deadline. After all, I can't take everything he owns until I have an inventory of everything he owns. And that is one mother of a scary form, as you can see here.

In short, as of the April 29, 2011 personal service on Patrick Ross, he now had a hard, 15-day legal deadline to do two things:

  • Remove a couple hundred posts from his so appropriately named blog "Nexus of Assholery", and

  • Submit an "under oath" list of every one of his earthly assets.

You'll never guess what Patrick Ross did next. Go on, guess. You'll never guess.


That's right -- having been physically located and having had some very serious legal documents with very serious legal deadlines crammed into his sweaty, sausage-like hands, Patrick Ross ... ignored them. I am not making this up.

After more than 15 days had gone by with nothing from defendant Patrick "Kid Cash Thunderbolt Assholery Nexus" Ross, my Alberta lawyer sent him a polite but firm e-mail, reminding him that (and I paraphrase) we were through fucking around and it was time for Patrick Ross to take this seriously or very bad things were liable to happen.

The response to this reminder was the hilarious, "What? You didn't get my documents? But I sent them! Oh, noez, I'll send them again, I promises!" And that's the last we ever heard from Patrick Ross, which is where things stand today. We have no idea where Patrick Ross is to be found, but we're fairly confident that when he is found, he will be in a world of trouble for his contemptuous dismissal of both the properly-served judgment and the properly-served Financial Statement of Debtor.

Anyone who's been following this clusterfuck for a while is well aware that Patrick Ross has always fancied himself quite the brilliant legal intellect. And yet, it would be hard to imagine how anyone could screw things up more than Patrick Ross has.

Patrick Ross has dug himself one monstrously deep and dark hole, and when he's found, life will become very unpleasant for him in a hurry. And it didn't have to be this way.

Patrick Ross was given every opportunity to walk back his malicious defamation. Instead, what we got was a constant litany of "Blar har har, OMFG!!" cackling, insults, threats, intimidation, and some of the stupidest legal strategy in the history of mullet-headed douchebaggery. And while Patrick Ross might want to play the aggrieved victim, he knows that he has only himself to blame for the shitstorm that his life is about to turn into when we track him down.

And that's your homework assignment. I'll shortly be posting everything we know about U of Alberta student and frat idiot Patrick Ross, but feel free to get a jump on the crowd. Ask around. Put out feelers. Follow the overpowering stench of dumbassitude. Whatever it takes. And when Patrick Ross is finally dragged into a courtroom to explain his actions, I'm guessing it's going to turn out very badly for him, indeed.

But that's just a hunch.

ADDENDUM: If one pops by Patrick Ross' now-dormant, craptacular blog "Nexus of Assholery," one will find very few blog posts left defaming me, but that has nothing to do with the co-operation of Patrick Ross.

Armed with a copy of the judgment, my lawyer and I convinced Google and Blogger Support to remove some 200+ posts that clearly infringed on the judgment. We got rid of that crap, since Patrick Ross made it clear he wasn't going to do it himself.

Seriously, when Patrick Ross is finally located and dragged before a judge, he will learn just how shitty his life is going to become.

DEC 23, 2012 UPDATE:  Just so no one invests any more time tracking down the fugitive defendant Patrick Ross for me,  this is the resolution of Patrick Ross' years of malicious defamation and legal evasion. That's right -- the yammering loon who relentlessly and condescendingly lectured others on accountability and personal responsibility and law & order and his own dizzying intellect recently hied himself to a bankruptcy trustee in Saskatoon and demanded that the government bail him out of his self-inflicted financial humiliation.

There is a certain irony when someone who perpetually mocks socialism and government aid and handouts and entitlement proceeds to, when the chips are down, scurry for the taxpayer-funded protection of personal bankruptcy when their troubles are entirely of their own making.  But if you're familiar with Patrick Ross, absolutely none of the above should surprise you.

At this point, Patrick Ross is welcome to his new lifestyle as a 31-YO, recently bankrupt, jobless university dropout living (literally, I am not joking) in his parents' basement in Lloydminster.  I hope it works out for him.  Most people have loftier ambitions.

AH, IRONY:  In which malicious defamer, legal fugitive, twice-found in Civil Contempt of Court and recent bankrupt Patrick Ross lectures others on taking personal responsibility for how their life turned out. You can't make this stuff up.

EPIC SELF-AWARENESS FAIL:  In a truly monumental display of lack of awareness, the 31-year-old, unemployed (and now almost certainly unemployable) recently-bankrupt, $85,000 legal judgment worth of convicted libeler and college dropout who now lives in his parents' basement in Lloydminster and spends hours a day shrieking manically at the pixels on his Cheetos-encrusted computer screen will now lecture others on how their online persona is affecting their future employment prospects.

Yeah, let's go with that.