Saturday, January 02, 2010

A Message From The Political Wilderness

Received the latest idiotic garbage from the office of waffle god and visiting professor Mike Ignatieff. If I were capable of such a condition, I'd be speechless. I wonder who's going to get to play the Kim Campbell to his Mulroney. Mind you Mulroney got to form a government, something this dipshit will never do.

Friend --

No, not actually. I can trust my friends not to betray my best interests or turn a blind eye.

Happy New Year.

That would look sublime on a resignation letter with your signature!

I hope you’re starting off 2010 in the spirit of the season, with friends and family, reflecting on the year that’s been and the one that’s just begun.

Yeah, I'll pass on the spirit of the season thanks. My reflection on the year that's been is one of deep and abiding disgust at Canadian politics. You and your counterpart in the blue sweater make me queasy.

It seems unbelievable that the Conservative government has prorogued Parliament for the second time in a year. Canadians are rightly starting to wonder if Conservatives intend to shut down government whenever things don’t go their way.

Unbelievable? Really? Where the fuck have you been all this time you pretentious dick? You sit across the floor from Harper and his government. This isn't unbelievable, it is as utterly predictable as your failure to respond has been sickeningly predictable. They aren't shutting down the government because things aren't going their way, they are shutting it down because they are a pack of unprincipled scumbags that don't care a fig about this country, its heritage or its people. They are doing this because there is no one across the aisle with the requisite balls to fight them or stop them. Don't give me
unbelievable and expect to get away with tucking your tail and rolling over like a supine mutt and still expect a treat. Bad dog. Bad.

While Conservatives will be in hiding, Liberals will be hard at work over the next few months.

Hey stupid, the Cons aren't going to be in hiding, they're going to be milking the Olympic whore train for every photo-op they can get. Harper will be licking Niedermyer's cup on the national TeeVee and his ugly herd of toads will be hopping about making promises they don't intend to keep and getting the fucking rings tattooed on their public images. You dipshits will be hard at work? I feel so reassured knowing that the most hapless bunch of losers in Canadian politics today will be straining themselves to sit up and not drool. But go on, what tremendous tasks have you set for yourselves?

On March 26 to 28, 2010, some of Canada’s leading progressive thinkers and doers will gather in Montreal for a conference entitled Canada at 150: Rising to the Challenge. They will be part of a national conversation about the Canada we want to be in 2017, when we celebrate our 150th birthday, and the steps we can take today and tomorrow to get there.

Thinkering and doering! How's this sound Mike... fuck you. Fuck you and the thinkers and doers. Come 2017, you'll be back on the tenure like a junkie that just can't stay clean. Canada is facing a crisis of governance and you and the fucking witless remnants of the once potent Liberal Party of Canada are going to prognosticate over the big party we'll have in 7 years time. You want a step, here's one... resign. And take Donolo and Kinsella and the rest of the Conservative lite assholes with you. Take Dryden, Rae, Cotler and the Liberal MPs for the riding of Israel with you. Take the team that nuked the possibility for a coalition to dethrone Harper and go fuck yourselves because there are a growing number of folks that are sick of your passive stance as Harper fucks this country over. Harper promised we wouldn't recognize this country by the time he was finished with it, he'll have long since achieved that goal by 2017, no thanks to you.

That conversation starts with you.

Oh please tell me that you're listening and that you're learning and that you want to be an alternative. Please tell me this while you're standing in the woods somewhere trying desperately to get your weaselly squinting eyes to open and your mirthless crag of a mouth to imitate a smile. Because you are every bit as useful in the woods as you are on the hill.

That’s why I’ll be spending the first few months of the year reaching out, travelling from coast to coast, holding town-hall meetings, web forums and small gatherings to hear from Canadians first-hand.

Dude, you forgot telepresence bar-b-cues. Note to Liberal Party honchos: Ignatieff experiment failed. We don't want you wandering around like a fucking undergrad trying to curry favour with the department. We want an opposition party that will have a fucking clue right out of the gates. We want an opposition party that has a platform, that can articulate that platform and has the will to fight tooth and nail to see this nation's interests looked after.

Your ideas, hopes, concerns and priorities will feed the discussion in Montreal.

How's about you stroll on into Montreal to chat and strategize about the year 2017 and feed on this message, fuck off losers. We have the
idea that an adversarial system of representative government should have a modicum of adversarial opposition. We have the hope that an opposition leader will not pattern himself as a dilute version of the current minority Prime Minister only with a distinct lack of policy and platform. We have a hope that someone that isn't a waste of valuable oxygen might step forward to fight for a Canada that advocates for our arts and culture, for the protection of all of our people regardless of race, gender or orientation and who might put up a fight for the rule of law both at home and abroad. We hope that our government will show a little spine in steering a path in the interests of our nation apart from the interests of corporations or larger neighbouring governments. We are concerned that the leadership of the two major political parties are driving the national vehicle into a fucking ditch that we won't easily be extracted from. Our priorities are peace, order and good governance none of which you or Harper are capable, willing or inclined to provide.

We’re starting off by visiting university and college campuses across the country – because a conversation about Canada’s future starts with the generation of Canadians that will shape it more than any other.

I do hope you plan on addressing all of those young people and apologizing for wasting their time, squandering their legacy and failing to look out for their interests. I hope you'll apologize for deciding it was better to bury your face in the crotch of the oil industry than to fight to clean up the tar sands or fight for alternative forms of energy and conservation. I hope you apologize for abandoning those poor young folk to a future of filth and environmental illnesses, you grasping narcissistic whore.

Tell you what Mike, make it a farewell tour and all will be forgiven, then you can write us all a book about how awesome you are. Jackass.


CK said...

I really think Iggy is on his way out. However, now with this sinister prorogation of Steve's, what's next?

What I wouldn't want to see is a Bob Rae coronation; I can just see Steve's ads on that one about his rather dubious past as an Ontario premier. That would definitely hammer the last nail on the Liberal coffin. Not to mention, Bob Rae would have a terrible showing in Quebec.

No, this time, there should be a contest, but obviously, one that can't wait until spring. What to do?

I will say this, although, this tends to be unpopular with most outside of Quebec, but a fact is that French speaking leaders from Quebec tend to be the most successful (Trudeau, Chretien, Mulroney); Dion is definitely an exception to that rule.

Not Denis Coderre neither.

Well, I just finished saying who it should not be and what type the new leader would have to be. Do I have an idea of precisely whom? No, sadly I don't. Hopefully someone else commenting here might.

Whatever the case: Steve is within majority grasp and with this lastest prorogation, he is plotting the next election call.

I know that a lot of folks feel that Steve has centered himself; couldn't be further from the truth. We should and must be terrified of a Harpercon majority.

American health care system, criminalized abortion and guns all over creation anyone with a leader who is a member of the Evangelical far right Christian Sub culture along with the likes of Georgie, Huckapee, See Sawah Run, Dickie, Kirk Cameron and his 'comfy' friend Ray. All this probably under a totalitarian dictatorship.

Sound extreme? Perhaps, but Steve is extreme. Also, can't forget those by election placards in the Hochelaga riding slogan: Action pas d'election. Thought at first it was a stupid mistake from copy writers, but now I wonder if that is where he wants to go?

Happy New Year all, here's to hoping for a miracle in 2010, like Stevie and his nasty evangelical nasty friends go away...permanently!!

sooey said...

The Liberals have squandered their time in Opposition by focusing on the Next! Big! Win! and ignoring the here and now.

Please send that rant right back to Mike. I can hardly wait to read his Valentine's Day card to you, Lindsay!

CK said...

Sooey, whatever the sins of the Liberals, don't you think they pale in comparison to those the Harperons?

What's more, I mentioned above only a few things Steve will do if unleashed with a majority; is it worth voting that kind of tyranny in solely to punish the Liberals?

Sooey, you chastise the Liberals for wanting to win; what do you think Steve is doing with that prorogation? He is plotting his poison pill to set off a more than likely spring election.

I still say the Liberals and the NDP should find common ground and merge; only way to survival.

It is, after all, how the Harpercons came to be; merger of the right.

Kim said...

Bravo! Same goes in the BC provincial shitstorm!

Ti-Guy said...

As much as it pains me, I've been instructed, by Liberal Central, to post the the following response to this post.

Please pity me. And remember, they've got my wife and daughter!

Lindsay Stewart said...

Your wife and daughter! How much did you get for them?

Ti-Guy said...

Fuck you, fuck you very very mu-uh-uh-uh-uh-uuch...Well we hate what you do, and we hate your whole crew...

Gosh, that's a catchy tune. I'll have to send it to my NDP MP in-law and my former Liberal MP uncle.

Fuck you, fuck you very very mu-uh-uh-uh-uh-uuch...

Anonymous said...

Should you not send the Canadian version?

"Fuck Ya" by MacLean & MacLean....

Lindsay Stewart said...

poor ti, the perpetual rim pucker of so many comment threads, as requested you have my pity.

sooey said...

Well, regardless of the Liberal performance in Opposition, I predict Ignatieff will do well on the actual campaign trail.

thwap said...

I'm so glad that i didn't receive that piece of shit mail-out.

Wonderful evisceration LS/PSA.

CK said...

Sooey, I think Iggy is on his way out and right now it's probably mutual on the part of the Liberal Party and Iggy himself.

It's time for new strategy.

As much as a competition would be a necessity, I'm wondering if there would be time? Given that Steve will probably launch a poison pill budget in March thus, orchestrating an April or May election.

Bob Rae is certainly not suitable. I can just see the Harpercon ads on that one.

LK said...


sooey said...

Ooh, nooooo. Replacing Ignatieff before he a campaign would be a HUGE mistake. It's the Liberals Canadians don't like anymore, not the leader. Their only hope is a "hold the nose" vote. And Ignatieff isn't overly associated with the Party. He's probably their best bet right now, in my opinion.

Lindsay Stewart said...

gosh sooey, i have to beg to differ on this one. i get the impression that nobody much likes ignatieff or the liberals. the patrician iggy, author of books too smart for joe timbit, rankles folks and there was a very negative response to his woodland casual ads. the sense i got was that people thought he was dishonest in his portrayal. couple that with the effective failure of spine when he brayed about bringing harper down and the highly athletic backpedalling since and you have a leader that has not captured the national confidence.

the liberals are in a 'damned if you do, fucked if you don't' sort of trap, a trap of their own making. as a roll over opposition with no discernible policy or message, with an uncharismatic and surprisingly inarticulate leader i would not be shocked to see our next government a slim con majority. and again that due as much to the ongoing, serial failure of opposition as the limp appeal of the cons outside their prayers & nose picking base. i really, really hope i might be wrong but even if i am and even if, miracle of miracles, the worthless liberals squeaked out a minority win, we'd still be saddled with a worthless neo-liberal government.

face it, that iggy guy, he's as sexy and appealing as bob stansfield and that fat kid, well hey, he can play that piano, eh.

CK said...

Sooey, Iggy leaving is the best case scenario right now.

That said, Bob Rae will never do.

Sooey, if you're saying the Liberals themselves are the problem, are you telling me folks are willing to sign on for Steve the totalitarian? Would you? Would anyone else commenting here? Steve has not lost his reform and NCC colours. Don't let his beatles lip syncing and his blue sweater vests fool you.

Lindsay, I hope you're wrong on this one. Slim majority means nothing; majority is a majority. That means enough for Steve to really bring us to Bush era America and much worse.

I venture to guess there wouldn't even be any more elections under a Steve majority. Remember the by election placard slogan of last November: De l'Action pas d'election. Sounds like a dictator in waiting to me.

Duceppe was successful in Quebec last election; no he didn't talk Quebec separation in the last election. He ran on an either him or Steve campaign; together with Charest, a former Tory himself, campaigning for them helped sink the Cons in Quebec. I imagine Duceppe will do the same thing.

Why couldn't this work in Ontario or anywhere else (forget Alberta)?

Yes, we'd like our parties to have a clear message. No we may not like the NDP and Liberals and bloc taking turns to support the Harpercons. It is done to prevent Steve from getting his majority.

One thing about Steve, no one can say that all political parties are the same and that is why the NDP and the Liberals should merge. It is why we shouldn't vote for Steve.

Write to your MPs, there is talk of the opposition MPs showing up for work Jan. 25.

Lindsay, if Harpercons do get their majority, it is because Canadians are too complacent.

If the stunts Steve pulled as of late were pulled by a leader in Europe, you can bet their citizens would take to the streets and make a whole lot of noise and not leave until something gave.