Helena Guergis (insert epithet here)

If there was a question about the intelligence and acumen of Conservative Secretary of State for Foreign Affairs Helena Guergis, it has been answered. CTV is reporting that Helena of Tory bopped off to Mexico for a couple of days at the end of January on the taxpayer's dime, ostensibly to address the case of Brenda Martin and other consular matters with Mexican officials. Turns out that while Guergis was just down the road a piece from the prison where Martin is held, she opted to attend a cocktail party with Canada's Ambassador to Mexico and various consular officials. The little shindig was put together by a group of retired Canadian ex-pats.

I suppose one could throw their hands in the air and plead the Canadian fallback excuse of free beer. But in all honesty, while it is achingly apparent that Canada's New Government and the Steve Harper Party of New Canada don't give a rat's arse for the fate of Brenda Martin, it is also apparent the Guergis is a terminally stupid piece of work. Guergis is going to wear this like a hat made of turds. The lazy, heartless slag couldn't even be bothered to extend herself enough to pop by for a press-placating photo-op.

Two attendees of the private function at the Camino Real Guadalajara hotel on Jan. 29 say Guergis arrived with Canada's ambassador to Mexico and local consular officials after 6 p.m.

About 20 Canadians were already there, said Dan McTavish, a retired Canadian living in Mexico.

"It was just a social gathering so that she could meet some of the retired Canadians living along the north shore of Lake Chapala," McTavish said.

"They provided hors d'oeuvres and drinks were served _ everything from soft drinks to anything you wanted, including a good bottle of Corona. It wasn't particularly fancy; it was very low-key, actually."

Of course you can't add insult to injury without a set-up.

She waited all day with close friend Debra Tieleman to hear from Guergis's aide, Axelle Pellerin, who accompanied the junior minister on the trip.

Early that morning, Pellerin sent Tieleman an e-mail, obtained by The Canadian Press, saying she and Guergis would arrive in Guadalajara at 2 p.m. and planned to stay for four hours.

"I have been told that there has been an extra meeting added to tomorrow afternoon," Pellerin wrote. "I will try to see how much time we have. I will at least try to arrange a phone call for you."

Cellphone reception is spotty in the prison, so Tieleman left Martin around 4:30 p.m. to wait outside for Pellerin's call.

"Brenda called me and called me and called me and called me, saying 'Have you heard from them? Have you heard from them? What's going on?'" Tieleman said.

Not only did Guergis not bother to put out any effort to visit the imprisoned woman in the news, she opted to enjoy some canapes instead but only after raising Martin's hopes and leaving her to twist in the wind.

Guergis's office didn't respond to an interview request.

Nor did her staff say why the Tory MP didn't visit Martin, even though she was in Mexico to raise the jailed woman's case with officials there.

Canada's New Government, Getting Things Done for... mmm, hors d'oeuvres. Nom nom nom. No comment.

"Government officials at all levels, including Secretary of State Guergis, have been working diligently on Ms. Martin's behalf since 2006," Guergis's office said in a statement.

All of that statement is perfectly true... except the 'working'. And the 'diligently'. Oh, and the 'since 2006'.