The stupid. It burns.

Shorter Brian Lemon: "It must be true. I read it in a Michelle Malkin column."

UTTERLY GRATUITOUS AFTERSNARK: It's nothing short of amusing that the hacktacular Mr. Lemon would link to a Michelle Malkin column, where Malkin writes:

Last weekend, 18 Afghans were released from detention in Cuba after 16 months of questioning in U.S. custody. They flew home and were held briefly in a Kabul jail. The Boston Globe reports that "nearly all of the former detainees enthusiastically praised the conditions at Guantanamo and expressed little bitterness about losing a year of their lives in captivity, saying they were treated better there than in three days in squalid cells in Kabul. None complained of torture during questioning or coerced confessions."

That was written in March of 2003. So one wonders how to square that with this piece from the same Boston Globe the very next year:

4 ex-detainees sue Rumsfeld, 10 others
Plaintiffs allege officials to blame for abuse at base

Four former Guantanamo detainees yesterday sued Secretary of Defense Donald H. Rumsfeld and 10 others in the military chain of command overseeing the American interrogation prison in Cuba, alleging that the officials are personally responsible for illegal acts of prolonged arbitrary detention and torture...

The four allege that during the course of their 2 years of detention by the US military, they were continuously interrogated and repeatedly mistreated, including receiving beatings and being held in isolation.

"They were 'short shackled' in painful 'stress positions' for many hours at a time, causing deep flesh wounds and permanent scarring," the complaint alleges. "Plaintiffs were also threatened with unmuzzled dogs, forced to strip naked, subjected to repeated forced body cavity searches, intentionally subjected to extremes of heat and cold for the purpose of causing suffering."

It would be interesting to see how Mr. Lemon's critical thinking faculties could possibly process two contradictory claims at the same time, but I'm guessing I know how that would turn out ... and it wouldn't be pretty:



Yeah, kind of like that.