That's right ... $5,765.00 ... the total value of the possessions of a 31-year-old from a province where even high school dropouts could rake in $100,000/year during those oil-soaked boom times.
If Patrick wants to fuck around and annoy the shit out of people on the Intertoobz, well, I'm happy to play that game as well.
BONUS TRACK: What exactly does it say about a 31-year-old man that one of his most valuable assets is a "Kill Bill Replica Sword"?
12 comments:
The valuation on that Ford Ranger has to be a black book trade-in or depreciation estimate value. Street prices on those things have never dropped below $4K - even for relatively stripped down units. (Pickup truck valuation is weird … really weird - I’ve seen absolute shitboxes go for fairly decent amounts of money as long as the engine is good)
Ford Rangers and those little Toyota trucks from the same 1990ish period still go for big bucks.
If the engine is trash, good luck getting another. That's the problem with them currently because parts are sparse and go for mountains of cash.
I remember a few years ago when I was in an accident with my Nissan Pathfinder and they wrote it off, I got almost $8000 for a 2004 model. I personally put over 370,000km on it and still had the original engine and transmission. It was an absolute workhorse. I wanted to find another, but most people know what they have and want far over black/blue book pricing. I love 2000-2008 vehicles because a person can still repair things themselves. Since 2009, vehicles use far too many chips and sensors that fail when the engine itself is fine.
The right to self repair is fading very quickly with everything we buy. The latest iPhone 13 has a horrible repairability score.
If I was looking for a Ford Ranger to bomb around town in, I would expect to pay no less than $3500 for one. Patrick's was in horrible shape when I saw it in St. Paul. I might still have the video of him leaving the courthouse that day, moping and talking to himself on the way to his car. He looked absolutely pathetic in his Dad's suit and horrible trench coat. I should find it. It always brought a smile to my face.
"Cash on hand - $0" How is that plausible? Where would his next meal come from if that was the case?
What was his $1 furniture/appliance?
@ROD: I’d imagine the $1 is a nominal value for “I have the same furniture I had in my college dorm room and it’s beat to crap”. With the exception of actual antiques, most furniture isn’t worth much anyhow. If you auctioned off the furniture in my house I’d be surprised if you got more than a couple of hundred $ for it. I have one or two items that might be worth a bit more, but in an auction lot? It isn’t going for much.
By the time I was 31 , I had half my student loan paid off & owned $15k in possessions, had $1,500 in the stock market, & $2k in savings. All while paying my own rent.
Patrick lived on student loans & his parents cash; this is all he had for himself at 31?
Conservative, my ass. Patsy's just a fucking right wing grifter who's mad that CC killed his chances of becoming a paid grifter like his hero boy Ezra.
By the time *I* was 31, I had a Master's degree in Computer Science and was an assistant professor, all accomplished after leaving home at the age of 16 to attend university.
If we're comparing. :-)
As a owner of an 07 Ranger, bought it new, still drive it great truck, I will just point out that some of the motors are Ford, in my case the bulletproof 4 L, and are not difficult to find.
By the time I was 31, I had my computer sciences degree (non-masters), 2 children, a divorce, and an established business with a store front that was turning a healthy profit.
It's also around the time I got into playing poker, so I likely carried around $5k+ in cash at any given time let alone be worth as little as that.
Sadly, I don't think Patrick's financial situation has changed much since that time.
I have watches worth more than Patrick..
And I wasn't even drunk....
I don't have a Ranger.
I have a Mazda.
Same truck but better looking sheet metal.
Sorry.
What is with Twatrick's handwriting? The shame of his meagre possessions was probably making him cry as he filled out that humiliating, emasculating form.
...but what about his replica championship belts???
"Kill Bill Replica Sword... $100."
To be fair, at 31 one of my greatest assets was a first edition, first state of The Sun Also Rises. I have it still.
Each to his own.
Kill Bill replica swords go for $65 and up on ebay.
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