Sunday, February 24, 2008

Getting Things Done Up Canadians

Who doesn't love that undersea rascal Spongebob Squarepants? Now you can welcome Spongebob into your home as a part of your personal health care equipment. Introducing the Spongebob rectal thermometer! When the little ones aren't feeling well, it can be very difficult to get them to cooperate with necessary treatment measures. Their innocent trust of a beloved cartoon friend can help ease the situation, they've opened their little hearts to Spongebob and now you can use him to open their, um...

Guaranteed to probably not turn your little fella ghey. Even takes accurate temperature measures of conservative kiddies!

Is there a Falwell in your life? Does the paranoid fear of an innocent cartoon cripple your already challenged neuronal pathways? Fear not conservative consumers, the free market is looking out for you too! Now, for the very first time anywhere, the fabulous Stevemometer! What could be more comforting than the very not gay face of Canada's new Prime Minister peering out of your arse whilst accurately and calmly assessing the truth of your rectal warming? He's had his head up his own ass for ages, now it's time he stuck his head up yours!


Red Tory said...

He's had his head up his own ass for ages, now it's time he stuck his head up yours!

LOL. Sounds like a winning sales pitch to me!

Ti-Guy said...

If I saw Stephen Harper's face heading towards my back passage, they'd need the Jaws of Life to deal with the clenching.

Although, now that I think of it...wearing a Stephen Harper mask could help a proctologist overcome his Conservative male clients' aversions to DRE's.