Don't you wish you could write like this?
AFTERSNARK: Pay careful attention to this part of Drifty's diatribe:
This is absolutely infuriating fuck-you-because-the-rules-don’t-apply-to-us thing that made so many of us discretely upchuck into our napkins even as we defended Clinton v1.0 time after time after time during the 90s.
This is (as Randi Rhodes said in the stand-up bit that cost her her job) the infuriating “Because her deal is always, 'Read the fine print, asshole!'"-thing.
After retroactively re-rigging the metrics for “winning” more times that I can count, it can no longer be said that Team Clinton moves the goalposts.
... they tear the goalposts down.
Make a bonfire out of them.
Have a weenie roast with ‘em.
Then whip their dicks out.
Then fuck the bun.
Then point a finger at us and solemnly swear that, “Ah did not have sex with that bun!”
Then yank a puck out of their pocket.
Fling it down field.
Announce that we were actually playing field hockey the whole time.
So none of Senator Obama’s “touchdowns” ever really counted.
And that the score is actually tied.
Sound familiar? It should. Yes, that would be partisan hack (and the CPoC's answer to Joseph Goebbels) Sandy Crux, who never saw a straightforward English word she couldn't pistol-whip into redefinition when it worked to her advantage.
And then there's the capper:
So ... we're going to celebrate what the Stephen Harper Party of Canada "has accomplished," which would, of course, be their "accomplishments," unless we also want to throw in some "plans" and "priorities" to pad things out nicely, since we can pretend those are "accomplishments," too, even though we're going to explicitly list them independently, as in "Plans, Priorities & Accomplishments."
In short, it's still an "accomplishment," even if it hasn't been, you know, "accomplished" yet. Deja vu, baby. Deja vu.