When there's only two dots, it shouldn't be that hard.

(Yes, I'm officially still on sabbatical but this was just too precious to pass up.)

First, there's this:

Audience Applauds As Giuliani, Tancredo Endorse Waterboarding Torture

During tonight’s presidential debates, candidates were asked whether they would support the use of waterboarding — a technique, defined as torture by the Justice Department, that simulates drowning and makes the subject “believe his death is imminent while ideally not causing permanent physical damage.”

Both former mayor Rudy Giuliani and Rep. Tom Tancredo (R-CO) suggested they would support using the technique. Specifically asked about waterboarding, Giuliani said he would allow “every method [interrogators] could think of and I would support them in doing it.” Tancredo later added, “I’m looking for Jack Bauer,” referencing the television character who has used torture techniques such as suffocation and electrocution on prisoners.

The audience applauded loudly after both statements.

And then there's this:

US search for 3 captured soldiers as Iraqi suicide attack kills 50

ARBIL (Thomson Financial) - Iraqi forces were assisting the US military in a massive manhunt for three US soldiers captured by an alliance of Al-Qaeda-led militant groups, ...

Now just sit back and watch the wankerhood be utterly unable to figure out what one of those has to do with the other.