Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Support the troops! Oh, crap ...

"Sarge! Sarge! That guy we brought in last month? That we turned over to the Afghanis? Turns out he's the number two guy in the Taliban! We need him back here right now! Where is he!?!?"

Well, shit:

Detainee transfer documents buried in Canadian military shipping containers

OTTAWA — Records of Afghan detainee transfer orders showing whether Canadian military commanders took the risk of torture into account are buried in sea shipping containers and "may take years" to locate, the Military Police Complaints Commission was told Tuesday.

The revelation by Maj. Denis Gagnon emerged when he was closely questioned by lawyer Paul Champ, who said the commission is on the verge of deciding whether it has to suspend public hearings, partly because of missing and delayed documents from the Defence Department.

Gagnon said the documents are "all thrown together in a storage bin, a sea container" and an assessment of how long it would take to catalogue documents and identify the records requested by the commission may take years.

That growing laughter you hear is the rest of NATO pointing at Canada and peeing in their pants.

P.S. And the Taliban, too. I'm betting they're howling so hard, they just ruptured something.

NOW THAT'S FUNNY: Over at Blogging Tory Victor's place, commenter "Marlin Spike" demonstrates an impeccable sense of timing:

The only people who should get this information are those who have qualified for a Level III or TSSA (Top Secret Special Access) security clearance. The only one on the committee that fits that requirement is probably Laurie Hawn due to his previous life as a Senior Officer in the CF. National Security is not a toy. Incredible, and irreparable damage can be done to a Nation, its Security Forces, and Individuals if Highly CLASSIFIED information is not properly safeguarded. I do not trust non-trained elected members (particularly non-Govt ones to “Get It” when it comes to material like this.

At what point do you simply become a parody of a human being?


Romantic Heretic said...

Looks like the Defence Department is skilled in all forms of warfare. *wink*

Will said...

Honestly, what's the big deal? Your average Canadian doesn't care about this:

CC said...

And as evidence, you link to the Canadian version of "The Onion?" That's just adorable. Really.

CC said...

Argh. I just been punked, since Will is from "The Albatross." Nicely done.

Niles said...

Ahuh. There are noooo federal standards for Defense Records Management apparently?

How odd...

and there's far, far more.

I guarantee if this cack-up was a corporation the Feds were after, this excuse would go over like a...screw that. it wouldn't go over, in the millions of dollars worth category in court decisions. If you can't corporately prove your innocence, you get dinged by default for being guilty. You don't get to walk away for not having records, oh darn.

Sea-cans are used as temporary storage for hardcopy records on a lot of 'work' sites. Are the Cons admitting DAOD is breaking its own information org standards? The kind of standards that are held up as international benchmarks for corporations?

Are these cans back in Canada right now? Really? Without shipping manifests and transmittals? Well gosh, if the records are that screwed up, I guess Steve better hire enough someones to go in there and start sorting to meet a deadline, bubbaboys. army of someones.

I'm not sure I recommend PM Steve getting anywhere near the Federal Archivists and Records C-servants right now. He could suffer the death of a thousand paper cuts.

vw: surbile. what the politicians being presented with this "oh-nooooooooos" might be feeling right now. a combination of surly and bile. I could hope they're not feeling servile enough to put up with this shit.

Ti-Guy said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
mikmik said...

I am starting to wonder why the fu*ck Michael Ignatiaf doesn't roast and rake the Harper Mouth Piece Corps every time something like this shit happens.

Every time, ya freeking wimp. What's the major problem?

Will said...

It's a tough hustle, CC, but somebody's gotta do it. What can I say? Our countrymen prefer the earnest thoughts of bloggers such as yourselves to my nonsense, and I am reduced to spamming the ones that I love. :)

Anyways, I love this. I think we're gonna have an election. That's gonna be good for all of us...!

deBeauxOs said...

Gosh, one does wonder what "Marlin Spike" had to say about Maxime Bernier, when he was minister for Foreign Affairs?

Particularly this: National Security is not a toy. Incredible, and irreparable damage can be done to a Nation, its Security Forces, and Individuals if Highly CLASSIFIED information is not properly safeguarded.

Mmm, yeah. Bernier took those stamps 'CLASSIFIED' and 'TOP SECRET' - especially when plastered all over NATO documents quite seriously, didn't he?

Crickets. Tumbleweed rolling.

Augray said...

Why does this situation remind me of the ending of Raiders of the Lost Ark?

Metro said...

" ... and irreparable damage can be done to a Nation, its Security Forces, and Individuals ..."

Sorry Marlin. Once I read the third Capitalized Thing that requires no capital, I treat the text the way I would one containing two or more successive exclamation points and stop reading.

There are other ways to convey that you're a serious commenter, and concerned.

Possibly appending a link to an appropriate lolcat might do for you?

Heh: WV = "noming."