Saturday, April 17, 2010

Fortunately, no children were violently slaughtered by Michael Ignatieff.


Delayed only momentarily by the need to change into some dry panties and have a quick smoke, Blogging Tory "JoJo" pens a gushing paean to regular guy Stephen the Corpulent:

Stephen Harper of the ‘Regular Canadians’ class

While Michael Ignatieff describes himself as a member of the elite “Political Class”, Canada’s Prime Minister continues to prove that he’s just plain folks.

Yesterday Stephen Harper dropped by the K-W area to watch his son Ben play in a volleyball championship tournament:

“This is just a dad here watching his son play volleyball,” said Harper’s spokesperson, Andrew MacDougall. “We’re just trying to keep this quiet.”


Harper's behaviour differs drastically, of course, from what we can only imagine would have happened if it had been Michael Ignatieff, who would undoubtedly have waited until midway through the third game, then uttered a blood-curdling shriek and launched himself onto the court where he would have ripped out and feasted on the still-beating heart of a 12-year-old blonde cheerleader while howling the praise of the Dark One, Cthulhu. Because that's just what Liberals do.

Following the volleyball game, regular guy Stephen Harper was quickly chauffeured back to the airport, where he caught a private government jet back to Ottawa just in time to perform another piano recital with the backing of the Ottawa Symphony Orchestra. Because that's just what regular guys do. According to his personal spokesperson.

9 comments:

sooey said...

A spokestoadie at the ready to claim "We're just trying to keep this quiet".

Oh the irony.

Cherniak_WTF said...

So Harper the corpulent decided to take some vacation time... I wonder if he will dock himself a day's pay since he was not running the country...

Maybe, but most dads don’t bring handlers, press secretaries and Canadian Security Intelligence Service officers to places like this.
How much did he cost the country for his little jaunt? I'm so happy that Canadian taxpayers are footing the bill so that he can slack off on Friday...

Ti-Guy said...

I bet Joanne's the type who'd cry on camera if a reporter ever talked to her:

Local "rube-on-the-street" reporter: "So, what do you think of the installation of the new crosswalk?"

Joanne: It's about time. When I think of the potential accidents that could have occurred here, the anguish of the mothers and fathers at losing their little one...*sniff*...*sob*...*choke..Can't go on..."

Reporter turns to husband, who smiles and rolls his eyes...

CC said...

So ... it would be something like this?

Ti-Guy said...

No. Much stupider, duller and more inane than that.

In any case, while JoJo's burbling and gushing over Harper's devotion to his kids, her own are smoking dope down at the end of the cul-de-sac.

Cherniak_WTF said...

Journalists are nothing more than stenographers, really...

What I find interesting is that many MPs have started using Twitter and other social media tools (and by coincidence many Boobing Tories also).

It kind of gives you an insight to elected morons...
From Tony Clement
In two hours I will unveil details of the Fairness at the Pumps Act. Note to fashionistas: it has nothing to do with sensible shoes.
I guess that is supposed to be a joke...

In reading many of the tweets you get a sense that some prefer to watch politics in other countries, have a love for right-wingers.... Man, you'd expect them to actually spent time running Canada...


Tony makes his job sound like an endless party..
Somehow I found 12 warm bodies to meet with at 9 am at #Junos. They mustn't have slept last night....
about 5 hours ago via Twitterrific


Survived--barely--#Metric gig. Was nearly stomped to death by estrogen fuelled mosh pit. Oh the ignominy...
about 18 hours ago via Twitterrific


Soon departing for St John's & #Junos. Packing tuxedo + Billy Talent & Trews rock t-shirts...
8:44 AM Apr 16th via Twitterrific


Sorry I'm late to the party; a busy day and night. But here goes: Go #habs Go!!
10:59 PM Apr 15th via Twitterrific

Moon Rattled said...

Let's just call them Blogging Whories.

CK said...

so that's what 'ordinary guys' do...thanks CC. Damn, I gotta get out more.

croghan27 said...

Did not that Leader of the Free World do the same thing in Washington, thereby giving the Secret Service major heart problems?

Is there nothing Our Glorious Leader does that is not a copy of someone else?