Sunday, October 12, 2008

I guess you had to be there.


Canada's Absolutely Most Superest Bloggiest Blogger tries her hand at edgy humour:



A bit of friendly advice, Kate ... given recent developments, opening with a sarcastic reference to cutting someone's brake lines doesn't really work for a lot of people. I'm just sayin'.

ONCE IN A WHILE, THE GODS SMILE ON ME. Yes, we here on the Left are angry. Very angry. Terribly, terribly angry, what with the clearly hyperbolic bloviating about, you know, severed heads on pikes and all that.

Luckily, the good folks over at "Sadly, No" do all the heavy lifting, so we can reproduce compassionate conservative gems like, oh, this, from one Dale Franks:

I’ll make a deal with the Left: You wanna impeach President Bush? Go ahead. Knock yourself out. In fact, let’s just go to the polls and turn the whole government over to the Democrats. You wanna run the whole show? Fine. Elect Howard Dean President. End all surveillance against possible enemy combatants, unless you can get a warrant based on probable cause. Withdraw from Iraq and Afghanistan immediately. Permanently kill the PATRIOT Act. Do whatever you want to do. I’m perfectly willing, at this point, to do it your way.

Huh. That sounds reasonable. Oh, wait ... Dale's not done.

I mean, really, what’s the worst that can happen? An American city goes up in nuclear fire? Well, it’ll probably be New York, Chicago, or LA. You know, a major city. I don’t live there, nor do most Americans. So we’ll be fine.

Um ... OK, some childish fear-mongering but no big deal, that's fine ... uh oh ...

But here’s the other half of the deal: If that happens, we get to march on Washington, drag you naked and screaming from your offices, and hang you from the ornate lampposts that line The Mall.

I'm assuming Dale simply forgot the smiley face on the end of that, right, Dale? Right?

Dale?

P.S. I'm thinking that tweaking Dale's prose might make for some amusing reading. How about:

"Sure, we'll let you responsible, prudent, fiscally conservative Republicans look after the economy. But if you fuck it up totally to the point where it wrecks the world economy and requires most of a trillion dollars in taxpayer money to even begin to fix, we get to march on Washington, drag you naked and screaming ... etc etc yadda yadda yadda ..."

Curiously, all of America's cities are still nuclear fire free, but the economy? Well ... it seems like someone should be swinging naked from a lamppost right about now, don't you think, Dale?

Dale?

No comments: