Saturday, December 26, 2009

Adventures In Thinkering! (Redux)

Don't judge a bookcover by the cover. No. Wait... go ahead.



In university I spent five semesters as an R.A. for a professor in the architecture department. He taught the mandatory, double credit course on iconography, I picked up on a bit of the jargon. Thus I feel I am as qualified as anyone to perform an learned interpretation of the cover graphic.

The author has established in the title that this work shall offer a course or path that one might follow to achieve a positive result for both student and educator. Breakthroughs in pedagogy await!



Step 1. Open book and follow arrow to Step 1, Subsection 1. Try to put the book in an old cassette deck, perhaps a jaunty Walkman. No wait, that isn't it. Read the book while you listen to tunes. Awesome. No that isn't it either. Read the book into the Walkman. Make sure the Walkman is one that records. Yes. We'll go with that.

Step 2. Hold your headphones above a pad of paper. Nothing's happening. It isn't working, shit. Wait, I got it. Put the headphones on and play back the recording of you reading the book and repeat it to the pad of paper. Maybe just mouth the words. Hmm.



Step 3. No! Play the recording back to yourself and write it down as you go. And look there's a foot long pen as thick as your niece's wrist. Lucky. That way you get a hand written copy of the book that is already sitting right next to you.

Step 4. Pull out the box cutter that was concealed in the rolled over top page of the notepad and turn it into molecules.

Step 5. Molecules!



Step 6. Hide the molecules in the third column of the pad.

Step 7. Jump the molecules around the misprinted field.

Step 8. Pour the molecules into the rectangular hole in the light bulb.

Hope that helped. You're welcome!


Scandalous Update Edition:

Let there be incestuous interlinking!

Yet Another Update, Trombones And Cabinetry Edition:

This post and the first 11 comments originated in February and have defied the laws of physics to reappear here in the afterbirth of Jesus's party day thus proving that global warming/climate change is a hoax. Adscam!

24 comments:

Kelseigh said...

Cripes, psa, I know how to read, already!

liberal supporter said...

Why doesn't it say "Dr" on the cover? Did she recycle this for her thesis?

Ti-Guy said...

The graphic makes sense until the box-cutter and the molecules. But the lightbulb at the end forces me to believe that figuring it out is a path to enlightenment.

You know, I think it's intended to create learning disabilities for any adult who's trying to figure it out. Which in turn, would compel one to buy the book.

Well pyaled, Dr. Crux.

*drool*

sooey said...

I'm going to buy it to read aloud at out next team meeting.

Niles said...

I didn't see a box cutter. I saw a highlighter. Maybe you get out of it, what you put into it. Would she choose the cover graphic art for a small press publication? Unless it's vanity press, I'm not aware of an average and especially first time writer getting that option.

That said, I'm certainly no fan of Ms. Crux. I suppose it's possible she's accomplished in one area and meteorically risen to her level of incompetence in bloggery editorial opinions, but I'd be up for a review of the book from a credible someone who actually works in the field rather than dissing a book by its cover.

Ti-Guy said...

Niles, you're too serious.

NĂ¡mo Mandos said...

PSA's interpretation left me doubled over with laughter. The back of my head hurt from laughing! Well done.

wv: bronhap

CC said...

Well done. Mind you, it's no King Kong vs Godzilla review but, then again, what is?

psa said...

dear gawd! they're multiplying... run!

LuLu said...

You noticed that, too? I thought it was just 'cause I'm beyond tired. Maybe they're possessed ...

Niles said...

Can't help it on some subjects. I've been emotional support at the ground zero of someone getting burned by lack of control over a book cover. I have kneejerk empathy for the resulting horror and humiliation.

Cherniak_WTF said...

It's a horrible cover Niles.

There is no need for that much kerning between the words "for" and "Adults", just strange looking...

What gets me is the mix of 3Dish and 2D icons with the various arrows...


And of course, the graphic makes no sense...
Even the numbers attached to the icons are 'effed up....

1- Book
Casette (no number)
2- Headphones
3- Very small notepad with pencil
4- Box cutters or highlighter
5- Coffee molecule
6 - Arrow
7- Arrow
8- Light bulb...


I'm still trying to figure out why the pencil (step 3) seems to have a cap on it...


Wait, it's a assembly guide!
Place the headpones on the robot head, place on robot body, reattach arm, put in nuclear fuel, and he will light up and read to you...

KEvron said...

i followed sandy's simple steps, and somehow ended up setting the clock on my vcr. thanks, sand!

KEVron

deBeauxOs said...

That's not a coffee molecule, it's one of those fugly balloon critters that circus-clowns-for-hire twist up for kids at their birthday parties.

Hmmm. A clue.

Lindsay Stewart said...

KEv, you still have a VCR? Cool.

Dr.Dawg said...

I do too. I had to put a piece of cardboard across the flashing clockdial. Now, thanks to KEv, I'll be following Sandy's simple steps. Or maybe inventing cold fusion all over again. Or making gold without that pesky backyard athenor.

wv="cosmos" !!!

Lindsay Stewart said...

I wonder if there are lightbulbs available with larger rectangular holes so you don't spill any of the molecules. Let me know how the alchemy works out Dawg, I could use some golds.

Dr.Dawg said...

Rats. It made a very bad cup of coffee. And I got a paper cut.

Frank Frink said...

This post and the first 11 comments originated in February and have defied the laws of physics to reappear here in the afterbirth of Jesus's party day thus proving that global warming/climate change is a hoax. Adscam!

I blame molecules for that. And incandescent light.

CC said...

Wolverines! No, wait ... wrong joke.

Cherniak_WTF said...

Can someone dissect the Harper family calendar images? Here's the cover:
http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_tZbZyZlKGwg/Szby1vxegFI/AAAAAAAAAjk/2i8RcG8yyeI/s1600-h/Harpers+on+Abbey+Road.jpg

deBeauxOs said...

Posted.
Comments are welcome.

Frank Frink said...

C_WTF

I notice young Ben is barefoot. That must mean he's actually dead.

Which Harper is the walrus?

Frank Frink said...

Now that I think about it I should probably go play Steve's NAC gala performance backwards and listen for clues.