Saturday, August 06, 2005

Death becomes him. (Or, how to destroy Bob Novak once and for all.)


In the midst of all of the gleeful giddiness over Robert "A Douchebag for Liberty" Novak's recent meltdown on CNN, I thought I'd try a slightly different spin. Rather than obsess over what Novak did, I think it would be more amusing to suggest what to do, and that is to destroy Novak's journalistic career utterly, totally and completely. (So I'm a prick. So sue me.)

As most careful observers have already noticed, Novak has managed to stagger along as a journalist only because he has steadfastly refused to discuss (at least until recently) anything whatsoever to do with the Valerie Plame case. Allegedly, this has been on the advice of counsel or some such bullshit story like that. Novak even made it clear that, if he was involved in a political discussion and anyone even asked him about "Plamegate", he would walk off the set.

Well, geez, how much more of a freakin' gift do you people need?

The obvious strategy is that every Democrat, every liberal, every left-winger who gets on a show with Novak should, the very instant they get a chance to speak, ask Novak to explain his part in Plamegate. No matter the topic, it should be Plamegate, 24/7. If Novak is true to his word (and it's hard to see how he could handle this any other way), he'd have no choice but to take a powder.

And it's not like Democrats would even have to deviously spring this on Novak without any warning. The proper response from any Dem invited to be on a show with Novak should be something like, "Why, yes, I'd be happy to participate. But, just so you know, I'm going to be all over Novak about this CIA thing from the get-go."

If every Democrat had the self-discipline to stick to this game plan, Novak's career as a journalist would be over. He would be so journalistically useless, he'd be radioactive. He'd have no value whatever as a host, moderator or participant. If the Dems make Bob Novak's life one long grilling over Plamegate, he would be untouchable. And it couldn't possibly happen to a more deserving traitor.

As for me, well, I'm getting kinda tired of giving the Democrats all these nifty ideas for free. Can I at least get a goddamned coffee mug out of this or something?

1 comment:

Lynne said...

"As for me, well, I'm getting kinda tired of giving the Democrats all these nifty ideas for free. Can I at least get a goddamned coffee mug out of this or something?"

You are assuming they are listening to you. I'm not sure they are listening to anyone at all. Evil as they are, at least the Republicans are united. If the Dems don't get their act together, many Americans like me are going to be looking at third party candidates, regardless of the consequences.