Tuesday, August 30, 2005

Read my lips, Paula.

Jesus Christ, how dense can one human being be?

CNN's Paula Zahn spoke with her about what she saw.

ZAHN: When do you think you might be able to go home?

[SUZANNE] RODGERS: Well, I actually went home about an hour and a half ago. And there is no home to go to. The apartment complex that I lived in, which is on the beach in Ocean Springs, is totally leveled. There's nothing there anymore.

ZAHN: Totally leveled?

RODGERS: Not as much as...

ZAHN: Totally lost?

RODGERS: Totally lost. Totally lost.

Yes, Paula -- lost. Totally lost. What part of "totally" is such an intellectual challenge? Mercifully, it finally sinks in and ... Oh, Jesus Christ, no, it doesn't:

ZAHN: We should help the audience understand, you're talking about a storm that packed 135-mile-per-hour winds. But help us understand...


ZAHN: ... the construction of an apartment building, where the whole thing went out to sea? You said there's absolutely nothing left?

RODGERS: There's nothing left...

Coming soon: "So, Mrs. Krempf, you say your family was killed by the hurricane. All of them? Every single one? Not one survivor? Help us understand, all dead, down to the last child, right? No one else left alive, is that what you're saying?"

Just kill me now, Lord.


Anonymous said...


I remember the first time I was aware that these people are ghouls. (I don't mean I didn't know that the media looked for disasters and stuff, I'm talking about the emotional makeup, or lack of same, of the individual casters. It was after Diana died, and I was watching the coverage on some station. A woman from People Magazine was on and I suddenly realized by her eyes and the way she was sitting that she was really PUMPED about all of it. She wasn't thinking about the boys losing their mother, or that a young, generally harmless woman was dead, but was thinking about, well, her career, how exciting this was, how bored she had been before Diana was wiped out in a car in a tunnel, etc. Well, today, of course, you see it all the time. I long, oh, so long, for a time when one of these one-the-spot folks is whipped out of the picture by a strong wind, or perhaps sucked into the sea by a big-ass wave. God, I want to watch that. Okay, I'll be quiet, now.

CC said...

Ah, yes:

We got the bubble-headed-bleach-blonde
Comes on at five
She can tell you ’bout the plane crash
With a gleam in her eye
It’s interesting when people die
Give us dirty laundry

Can we film the operation?
Is the head dead yet?
You know, the boys in the newsroom got a
Running bet
Get the widow on the set!
We need dirty laundry

Anonymous said...

Dave Lister - "Where is everbody?"

Holly "They're all dead Dave. Everbody's dead dave."

David Lister: The captain, first mate?

Holly - "Dead Dave. They are all dead."

Dave - "Kochanzky?"

Holly - "They're all dead Dave, Everybody's dead."

Dave - "Andrews?"

Holly - "They're all dead Dave. Everybody's dead"

Dave - "Rimmer?"

Holly - "They're all dead Dave. Everybodys dead, they
are all dead Dave."

Dave - "So what are you trying to say?"

Holly -"Why do I even bother"