Thursday, July 15, 2021

Adam Skelly: The resolution.

 


I have been informed by a moderately unreliable source that our long national Adam Skelly nightmare is over, and it went down like this (paraphrased, with monetary amounts changed to disguise the actual figures):

Rebel-supplied lawyer: "All right, you've been fined $5,000, but we're setting up a fundraiser to fight this. It won't be cheap but it's the principle that counts."

... time passes ...

Skelly: "So how are things going?"

Lawyer: "Really well. We've raised $8.9 million, which is good since this will be a tough case that is almost certain to get to the Supreme Court. We have a full-time staff of 27 attorneys preparing as I speak, and we'll be making arguments to challenge the basis of the Charter, the Magna Carta, the Ten Commandments and the Code of Hammurabi. This will take years, but I'm confident we can affect a change in Canada's Charter of Rights and Freedoms by 2036. Don't you worry."

... long pause ...

Skelly: "So, just to be clear, I now have access to $8.9 million, free and clear to use as I want, in order to spend the next 15 years to fight a $5,000 fine. Do I have that right?"

Lawyer: "Exactly, and let me assure you, we will never rest, we will leave no stone unturned, we will ..."

Skelly: "Fuck off, you're fired."

And that's how I hear it went down.

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