Sunday, March 20, 2005

Baseball, steroids and bright, shiny things.

Apparently, Republican Sen. John McCain is really, really, really put out by this steroids thing going on in baseball:

Saying Major League Baseball "can't be trusted," Sen. John McCain warned Sunday that legislation might be needed to force the sport to change its steroids policy.

To which your friendly neighbourhood Canadian Cynic is forced to respond, who gives a fuck if baseball players are taking steroids? I sure as hell don't. If I were an American, I'm pretty sure I'd have bigger issues to occupy myself. 1500+ dead troops in Iraq. Exploding deficit. Tanking currency. The hideous evil that is the new bankruptcy law. Savage curtailment of civil liberties. A GOP administration trying desperately to dismantle Social Security. Oh, yes, I could go on with one nightmare after another.

And yet, what do you get from those paragons of ethics and integrity on Capitol Hill? Holy crap, professional athletes are taking performance-enhancing drugs! Well, Jesus, if that don't beat all, eh? Who would have guessed? Shocked, shocked I am that such things could be happening!

I mean, baseball is almost totally unwatchable as it is. You think knowing the players themselves are juiced is going to make the game even less appealing? Oh, please. And the bogus controversies just go on and on. Corked bats?!?! The horror, the horror! But that's OK, since all of this political anguish is just a handy diversion. Quagmire in Iraq? Hey, ball players on 'roids! Skyrocketing price of oil? Whoa, over there -- Terri Schiavo so let's drop everything to pass a special bill to deal with it and fuck people who can't get medical care because they can't afford it anymore.

Dear Americans: You are being played for total fools. "Well, yes, harrumph, well, um, yes, the situation in Iraq has pretty much gone to shit and ... hey! Over there! Bright shiny thing!"

And the sad thing is, you fall for it every time.

: Apparently, I'm not the only person who thinks this way. Read the first paragraph.

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