Monday, May 01, 2023

Chronicles of Twatrick: Patrick and the $500 bounty.

In the midst of all of Patrick's hypocritical and baseless shrieking lately about stalking and harassment and license plates (all of it dishonest nonsense), I thought it would be useful to point out that I am still willing to shell out $500 for verifiable information regarding Patrick Ross' current residence, place of work and the identity of his vehicle. Nothing that's happened lately has changed that, but I'm going to open up the bounty in an amusing way:

This reward is available to any of Patrick's family members.

That's right -- if any of Patrick's siblings are tired of his shit and want to pick up some cash at the same time, I will just as happily Interac one of them the $500 for that information. So if any of you know any of Patrick's unfortunate and long-suffering family members and hear that they might be in need of a quick cash infusion, well, point them in this direction.

And thanks for stopping by.

BONUS TRACK: While I mentioned this previously, it's worth pointing out how Patrick has fucked himself royally with his latest stunt. Currently, Patrick is bragging about how I am "losing" a defamation lawsuit to him -- this is an interesting claim since he has not even properly served me with a Statement of Claim and, since Patrick insists on representing himself, when he finally gets around to doing that, he is legally required to provide a valid address for service so that I can similarly serve him back. And now you see Patrick's problem.

Until now, Patrick has insisted that his proper and legal address for service is his father's residence in Lloydminster, but we have long established that that is bogus as legal documents sent there via registered mail are never signed for and accepted. And now Patrick has made things even worse by fabricating this latest excuse for personal outrage and insisting that, for his own personal safety, he is slinking off to some undisclosed "safe address":



At this point, if Patrick refuses to provide a valid address where he can be personally served with legal documents, then as long as he insists on representing himself, he can't serve me. To put this in terms even Patrick can understand, as long as he represents himself, he can't sue me without disclosing where I can serve him back.

In other words, Patrick did not think that one through. I'm sure you're surprised.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

I can't imagine how funny it would be if one of Patrick's own family members turned him in. I don't think I'd ever stop smiling.

Anonymous said...

I totally would if I were his family - hey, $500 is $500

Anonymous said...

Given that Patrick is currently complaining about how your looking for him is subjecting his family to criminal harassment, you'd think they would want to turn him in just to stop the harassment. Come on, Chris, Jennifer or Penny ... do it for the family.

Anonymous said...

I've been watching this debacle play out for a long time, and I don't think I've seen anything as potentially funny as one of Patrick's own siblings ratting him out for $500. But I have a better idea.

It's likely that $500 just isn't enough to do the trick, but you don't want to risk even more of *your* money to convince one of them. So why not start a GoFundMe page? Describe it as collecting for a bounty strictly payable to only Patrick's siblings, with the first one coming up with information collecting whatever's been donated.

I'll bet that as soon as enough money is in there, one of those people will turn on Patrick, and they'll all know that if they wait too long, one of the others might beat them to the cash.

What do you think? How much would it cost to buy one of those hillbillies? I'd donate $50 for sure.

CC said...

Anon @ 12:23 PM: Holy shit, that's wicked ... I like it. But given that the three of them might collude to let the money keep rolling in until they have enough to share, I might change it a bit.

I would put a cap on how much could be collected and paid out (maybe $2,000 or something like that). And once that cap was hit, I'd have a requirement that it had to be collected within, say, a week, or the whole thing is cancelled. That way, there's a limit to how much those yobs could collect, and they can't just sit around and think about it for too long or it disappears.

Oh, man, this has potential. I'm going to give this some thought.

RossOwesDay said...

Like I said yesterday, some of the commenters on this fine blog are brilliant.