Hi there kids! Did you ever wish that you had a stalker? You know, some troubled soul that either detests or loves you to the point of mania. It's like all of the attention you could ever want, multiplied by all of the attention you never wanted with a side order of creepy. You really should try it. I've had several stalkers and I currently have an over flow stalker from a friend whose ex blames me for her ditching his crazy ass. I just can't say enough about all of the hang ups and phone calls in the middle of the night. There's not much more exhilarating than noticing that familiar shape folding into the shadows as you put the key in your door at night. And who doesn't want to find out that the person leaving all of those psychotic notes under your door got taken away for holding a knife to her best friend's throat. What's not to love about that?
But hey, those are real life local stalkers that have physical proximity and access to your self and home, your place of work and your friends and acquaintances. Then there's Patrick Ross.
Patrick is the puckmaster of an online toilet called the nexus of assholery. True to his claim he is indeed an asshole. Patrick is one of those sausage built jackholes that likes to bark names at folks and whine like a teat deprived baby when he gets smacked around the ear for his trouble. In other words, a conservative blogger. And why would i be bothering with this tard? Well the other day there was a bit of a todo over the Florida tasering of Andrew Meyer. Dr. Dawg got into it with KEvron and their differences migrated here and there was much debate and agreeing to disagree. In the course of things, I said a few unkind things about Ross. In short I called him a tainted shit. Which is fair enough, considering his penchant for online stalking.
Ross has been part of a tawdry movement to expose the identity of our host, CC. Ross has allied himself with such luminaries as Werner Patels and Richard (bigger bounty) Evans in this effort. Not because knowing the name of CC will in any way help them but purely because they wish harm to come to him. Not because the identity of CC will improve their chances of winning a battle of wits but because that exposure might induce some like minded soul to do violence to him. Violence that they could relish, cheer on and take pleasure in vicariously. There is nothing positive to be gained by knowing the name and identity of CC. He can be found readily enough, right here in the pixel box. The fact is that CC has stung these goobers with his words and they detest his ideas and ideals. They want to hurt him. Simple. They want to see him come to economic, social and physical harm.
All of which brings us to this:
"In a recent post at Canadian Cynic's blog, Pretty Shaved Ape (reportedly, also known as Lindsay Stewart, a Waterloo-area actor/waiter -- read: failed actor) has chosen to address a disagreement between Dr. Dawg and the ever-petulant and mindless KevRon."
Well, well, well. Congratulations Patrick Ross. You have discovered my name. I am indeed Lindsay Stewart. Thing is, Patrick likely found out this dark and mysterious secret by digging through the archives of my old blog The Terminal Velocity of Sausage. I choose to post under a pseudonym because it's a character to play, an extension of me and a personal buffer. There have been a few occasions where I have either posted or signed off on a post using my real name. Those are generally posts that are either more personal or important to me. So congratulations once more Patrick that's really quite a coup, you have earned your Steve Janke boy detective badge.
Now the thing is, I work in the entertainment industries on occasion. Hence the mortally stinging rejoinder that I am a failed actor. As a result, I am accustomed to my name being public and I accept that there are going to be people that resent me for it. The business of entertainment is often bitter, petty and mean. Entertainers have to be both incredibly tough and vulnerable. Tough, to withstand the very personal judgments people freely make and vulnerable, to have access to the emotional landscape from which the work derives.
Am I rich and famous? Nope. Am I a failure? If money and fame are your only yardsticks, yup. Does it matter? Nope. See the thing is, if you're actually pursuing your art, learning and applying what you learn, then you aren't a failure. Is the measure of success the size of the stage you work on? I don't think so but I've worked on major motion pictures as well as no budget indies. If Patrick wants to play a round of curriculum vitae one on one, I have no doubt that my achievements will easily trump his. Thing is I don't care about that. I don't do what I do for the reward at the end, I do it because it is what and who I am. Acting, music and writing have either supplemented or been the source of my income over the last two decades. Is that success? Nope. I've been lucky enough to do a lot of work that had integrity, that challenged me and taught me things about the art and about myself. That's success to me. I don't need a personal jet, thanks.
For the sake of anyone that gives a toss, arguments over my success or failure can soon be put to rest. Let's say that come the new year you judge for yourselves. Over the last while I have been putting the finishing touches on a recording project consisting of 13 original songs, penned and performed by Lindsay Stewart (reportedly also known as pretty shaved ape). When we finish the mixing and mastering, I will post them and you can download them. There will be a Paypal button but there will be no obligation to use it. Payment will be strictly voluntary. You can let me know whether I succeeded of failed with your words or coins or however you like.
What's more, in the new year I will be launching a larger and more involved project. I have already invested significant time, energy and cash into this venture. As the project takes shape I will keep those interested informed. Maybe Patrick will post a list of his complete hockey card collection to prove what a wicked, awesome dude he is. Or something.
I'll still post what I post and you can celebrate or revile me as either or both Lindsay Stewart and the pretty shaved ape. Patrick will continue his foolish stalking and misrepresenting others until he gets tired and has to have more snacks. He is dishonest and petty and I am sure that he is a smashing success, probably has a merit badge in foosball or something.
What really matters is intent. I'm intent on contributing to the body of art and entertainment in a variety of media, amusing myself and others along the way. I don't object to my name being known though I do object to the manner in which it has been made known here. Patrick's intent is for me to feel some distress at this exposure. he means it to be hurtful and he takes pride in the intent. That makes Patrick Ross an asshole, a dishonest, petty asshole.