What fresh stupid is this?

It's a day ending in 'y', so Toronto "citizen journalist" Mark Slapinski is tweeting something unbelievably fucking stupid:

Tune in tomorrow when Mark Slapinski tweets something else unbelievably fucking stupid.

Satire or parody? You be the judge.

 

Speaking of misinterpretation ...

Uh huh ...

Somewhere, Dale Smith is reading that tweet and rolling his eyes.

Uh, this seems problematic.

There's this:

as it is accompanied by the following screed from serial prevaricator Sheila Gunn Reid:

"A star-studded lineup of Freedom Heroes will grace the stage in both cities, including Tamara Lich, the organizer and heart and soul behind the Freedom Convoy."

Correct me if I'm wrong, but wasn't one of Lich's bail conditions that she not encourage or promote any of that Convoy stupidity? Is it time for Lich to be going back to jail? One can only hope.

P.S. Also, is it not problematic to advertise Lich as "the organizer and heart and soul behind the Freedom Convoy" if she's trying to downplay her involvement to escape culpability? Can someone bring this description to the attention of Paul Champ?

Holy fuck ... troll much?

This is a 19-follower bot auto-responding:

Now you know what we're up against.

Dear CUPE protesters:

If you are not parked outside Stephen Lecce's home blowing air horns 24 hours a day, you're doing it wrong.

So, how's that whole "alpha male" thing working out for you?

I'm baffled as to how all these kick-ass he-men Convoyers turn into the biggest crybabies the minute they take the stand. Jesus, suck it up, buttercup. What a bunch of children.

JUXTAPOSE!

"Freedom Convoy" participants who breathed poisonous diesel fumes for three straight weeks insist they did it to avoid putting anything unhealthy or possibly dangerous into their bodies.

"We need to turn this into the PM's problem."

And that's all you need to know, the operative word being "problem." That would be the CPC's Candice Bergen, in a February email, clearly and explicitly describing the Freedom Convoy siege of downtown Ottawa as a "problem" for which she hopes the PM will shoulder the blame.

Boom.

It's over.

Regardless of how the CPC and its mouth-breathing lackeys want to frame that three weeks as legal or lawful or peaceful, the instant Bergen characterized the trucker occupation of Ottawa as a "problem," she was conceding that it was a bit of ugliness she hoped she could use politically.

There is no walking that back. At all.

You don't get to gush over the legality and peacefulness of an insurrection publicly, only to admit it's a "problem" behind the scenes. (And need I point out the unseemliness of admitting something is a "problem" even as you hobnob with, and encourage, the very people creating that problem?)

To clarify:

• The CPC conceded the trucker occupation of Ottawa was a "problem" and hoped Justin Trudeau would be forced to deal with it.
• He dealt with it.
• Now they're whining about how he did it.

Fuck those people.

Brian Lilley is the Anthony Furey of Lorrie Goldsteins.

Not sure how I can get more insulting than that.

Twatwaffle!

Still as much of a deranged, yammering colostomy bag as ever.

The Emergency Act Inquiry in three parts.

Conservatives: "We demand an inquiry!"

Feds: "OK, then."

Conservatives: "Did not think that one through."

Why *exactly* is Tamara Lich a "hero"?

There's a delightful bit of video here wherein British radio host James O'Brien asks a caller 15 separate times to list a single laudable achievement of Boris Johnson, and the caller comes up utterly empty.

Which brings us to Tamara Lich.

In the midst of the current EA Inquiry and so many yobs insisting that Lich is a hero of some kind, it behooves us to ask ... can anyone point to a single accomplishment of hers? That is, just one achievement that, in any way, benefited Canadians other than her and her fellow grifters.

Let us first dispense with any responses that involve how she, in some way, "fought" for Canadians, or "worked tirelessly", or "sacrificed", or what have you. I have no interest in being lectured on the amount of effort Lich put into this grift; I'm after actual results.

There is also the nonsense as to how Lich and her fellow con artists somehow restored freedom. This is, of course, patently untrue, as the "Freedom Convoy" resulted in absolutely no mandates being dropped. (Not to mention that many COVID-19 mandates and restrictions were provincial, while others were imposed by the United States related to border crossing.)

So, again, can anyone anywhere identify a single achievement of Lich's that justifies her being idolized to this extent? Because I'm just not seeing it.

Could Andrew Lawton please shut the fuck up?

OFFS ... get off the cross, we need the wood.

BONUS TRACK: Local lawyer and social media threading specialist James Bowie enumerates the 9,437 errors on a single page of Lawton's magnum dopus.

Maybe when I get my next quarterly bonus.

I'm sure I have some sort of celebration coming up I can use as an excuse.

This is what stupid looks like.

 

Dear Vassy Kapelos: How to interview.

This is how you hold someone accountable.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

You keep using that word "immense" ...

P.S. Hang on, what's this? Once upon a time, Rebel News was pandering for cash with the clear implication that 15 Rebel "journalists" would be on-site at the EA Inquiry doing what they do -- annoying people and lying about what happened:

Maybe it's just me but when someone fundraises based on the assurance that fifteen Rebelers will be in Ottawa "for the next six weeks," then it seems safe to conclude that there will be 15 Rebelers in Ottawa for the entirety of that six weeks.

And not this:

Again, perhaps it's just me, but I think there's a palpable difference between "15 people will be there the entire six weeks" and "A total of 15 different people will rotate in and out for six weeks." Oh, well, whatever separates the rubes from their rubles, I guess.

Dear Andrew Lawton: Please shut up.

 

Fuck around, find out: Ron DeSantis edition.

Apparently, Florida governor and budding fascist Ron DeSantis' recent stunt to stuff migrants on a plane to Martha's Vineyard is backfiring spectacularly:

There's something vaguely familiar about dictatorial fascists bundling undesirables onto transportation and sending them elsewhere to get rid of them.

It'll come to me.