Sunday, June 07, 2009

Dear stupid, evil wankers: Here's your chance to not be stupid or evil.

Here at CC HQ, we have a saying: Canada's wanks are not to be engaged, they are to be mocked. And that's because, quite simply, they have nothing to say worth listening to, being the horrendous collection of ignorant, illiterate, racist, neo-Nazi, white supremacist homophobes that they are. But perhaps we're being a bit hard on them. So we're going to give them a chance to redeem themselves. So pay attention.

The big news these days relates to one Abousfian Abdelrazik, and how the Honourable Mr. Justice Russel Zinn just delivered a nad-crushing boot to the privates of the bigots and yahoos that comprise the current Harper government. And what a thing of beauty that judgment was. But let's back up a bit.

For quite some time now, many of Canada's "progressives" have been blogging in support of Abdelrazik, typically with posts based on thoughtful and nuanced discussion of the legal aspects of the case, with references to basic rights, citizenship, and so on. You know, posts that actually said something.

On the other hand, however, many of Canada's conservatives have produced blog posts whose contents could be fairly summarized as, "Let him rot, he's brown, and what kind of name is 'Abousfian Abdelrazik', anyway, HAHAHAHA, stupid darkie!" Or something indistinguishable.

But now that Zinn's judgment has been published, perhaps it's time to see if Canada's wanker community can rise to the challenge and produce something -- anything -- on this topic that isn't, well, you know, ignorant racist shit.

Certainly, some of the usual progressive suspects have been producing stellar stuff. And there's way more where that came from -- numerous progressive contributions to the public discourse that delve into all of the legal and social aspects of this case, thought-provoking pieces truly worth reading. And from the Right? *Crickets*.

But let's be generous here, so what I'm offering is an open invitation for any of Canada's typically drooling mouth-breathers to examine this case -- and in particular Zinn's judgment -- and explain to us where he went wrong. Because it is possible. Maybe Zinn really did miss the mark and, if that's the case, I'd certainly like to know how. I'm always up for some careful, methodical legal analysis, and if any of Canada's wingnuts wants to contribute something to the conversation, they can do so, and drop me a note, and I will link to it for further discussion. But let's make something clear first.

What we're looking for is well-written, substantiated prose, based on a clear reading of Canadian law. What we're not looking for is, "HAHAHAHAHAHA, stupid dark person, fucking terrorist!" You know ... viciously ignorant, worthless shit like, say, this. For obvious reasons, that's not going to qualify.

In particular, and while I know he's terribly, terribly busy over at the Manning Centre for Building a Support Structure for Canadian Wanker Idiots and pondering Michael Ignatieff's choice of cereal, you'd think that with his avowed concern for, you know, freedom and democracy, Wingnut Welfare Boy Wonder Stephen Taylor would be all over this issue like white on rice. And yet ... a deathly silence. Not a single post from the Manning Centre itself:

How ... curious.

So, wanks, here's your chance. For the longest time, we on the Left have accused you of being intellectually-crippled, racist troglodytes because, well, duh. But now's your chance to get even and show us who the real intellectuals are. So pull up a keyboard, run off a copy of Zinn's decision and, by God, explain to us where he fucked up.

This is your chance to strut your stuff, so don't let us down. We'll be waiting right here and, when you're done, just drop us a note with a link. Our e-mail address is up there on the right.

*Sigh*. No, your other right.

HEH. Oh, this is sweet. Right-wing racist "BlazingCatFur" (aka Mr. Kathy Shaidle, whose wife undoubtedly keeps his nads in a lockbox and only returns them when certain needs arise) has obviously noticed my little link above and has already massively rewritten his post. No big deal -- all the delicious stuff is in the comments section.

But it is amusing to note that he links to ideological buddy "Dust My Broom", which gifts the curious reader with:

I'm guessing that Darcey over at DMB realized he didn't want anything to do with this, and bailed on that post. Good thinking, Darcey. I'm pretty sure sticking up for Arnie Lemaire is not the hill you want to die on.

P.S. It's amusing to read Lemaire's breathless revelation that others have frantically grabbed a screenshot of the post in question. I'm not sure what the value of that screenshot is -- anyone who wants is welcome to read the post right here. Unlike those worthless idiots, we here at CC HQ don't disappear our posts. Now, where were we? Oh, right ... waiting for Canada's wanks to write something worth reading.

Still waiting ...


Dr.Dawg said...

The Burning Pussy seems to have conflated two posts. The Moon stuff at the bottom is accurately reproduced, and the comments remain (screenshot!). I can't imagine why Ahhnold did this, because the top and the bottom parts of the new post are different topics entirely. Did he want to try to tack on a little substance once you drew attention to his silly two-liner?

wv: "zoodiste" -- Ms. Shaidle's worst nightmare.

CC said...

You should, of course, appreciate the irony of Mr. Lemaire crowing victorious about getting a screenshot of my post, from a post of his in which he has just replaced the entire content.

If it gets any funnier than that, I'm not sure how.