Wednesday, September 20, 2006

No, not THOSE religious extremist terrorists. The OTHER religious extremist terrorists.

Over at My Blahg, Robert discusses the notion that even the North American neo-con whackjobs understand that they'd probably come out on the short end of a real "religious war." To which one can properly respond ... well, duh.

I mean, when the "enemy" is quite prepared to sacrifice suicide bombers but the best we can expect out of our Bible-thumping cheerleaders is that they're prepared to put on something red and hang out for the cameras for a while, well, I'll take the foreign extremists and the point spread, know what I'm sayin'? But that's missing the larger picture.

It's not the foreign Islamogothiextremojihadifarians that worry me. It's these lunatics. Make no mistake -- the foreign religious loons concern me. They give me reason to be wary. But the local religious Christopaths? They scare the crap out of me, because they're the Scripture-spouting idiots who do shit like this.

When it comes to the foreign nutjobs, maybe we can protect ourselves against explosives and rocket-propelled grenades and suicide bombers. But the homegrown ones? They have a much more evil agenda -- they want to totally fuck us over from the inside.

These are the clinically-insane devout, who want to expunge actual science from public school classes and replace it with fundamentalist Christian drivel. These are the yahoos who want to curtail womens' rights, and gay rights, and want to change the law so that they have the right to deny service to anyone who doesn't quite measure up to their moral standards.

Swarthy, middle-Eastern extremists with shoe bombs, I can deal with. But that doesn't begin to compare with the fear I feel when I imagine vicious, ignorant dingbats like this possibly running the country.

Suddenly, the Islamojihadifarians don't seem like such a big problem anymore.

P.S. It's not just that the homegrown religious warriors seem bent on trashing Canada from a human rights point of view -- they're also just plain stealing our money.

Consider the recent giveaway of almost half a billion dollars of softwood lumber money to the United States. The Canadian wankersphere would have us all believe that this was a small price to pay to get a "deal." But ask yourself a simple question -- would the CPoC have been as accommodating if it had been President Al Gore in the White House and all that money would have been going into Democratic coffers to be available as a completely unaccountable slush fund for the next U.S. federal election?

Don't make me have to answer that for you, OK?


steve said...

One of your best. I imagine you cackling away as you write these.

Thanks for making my mornings better.

Deanna said...


There have been vacation Bible camps in North America since my mom was a kid. I and my siblings spent a few summers there; so did most kids in our area, Christian or not, since it was the only summer camp around.

Yes, they did ask you to memorize bible verses, yes, there was chapel every evening, and yes, you put on a little pageant at the end, but most of the time it was pretty fun. Lots of activities: swimming, puppetry, canoeing, archery, hiking, riflery, outdoor arts (making fires and all that Boy Scout kinda stuff), and so on.

Most of us were willing to put up with the bible stuff because the rest of it was so fun. Mind you, this was a rural area, with lack of fun things to do, and if you were at home during the summer, your parents always found lots of chores for you to do...

On the other hand, camps where kids are trained as soldiers for Jesus?

Batshit insane, boyo.