The predictability of right-wing wanker rhetoric, and what to do about Weasel Boy.

It's not like I want to belabour this -- God knows, even I get tired of hoofing someone in the nads when they're just lying on the ground, not even trying to protect themselves -- but this is such a delightful example of my four rules of wanker rhetoric, I have to share it.

Recall, if you will, CC's four stages of wanker rhetoric here, summarized (in chronological order) as:

1. Unreasoning embrace of nonsensical position.


2. Redefinition of basic terms to suit the argument.


3. Unexpected change of subject to avoid impending defeat.


4. Sudden admission of error, accompanied by insistence that this whole thing is no big deal.

Note especially point two, in which the wanker begins to redefine basic terms to suit his claim, generally using words in subtlely non-standard ways. Which brings us to Jinx "Weasel Boy" McHue in the comments section of this piece, who knows exactly what the issue is, but keeps twisting basic definitions to avoid the obvious.

If you have the stomach for it and want to recap, the issue -- the primary issue -- is whether GOP House Majority Leader (R - Total Sleazebag) was really and truly "called to Rome" as part of "the U.S. delegation", as he claimed. And note well the emphasis on "the" U.S. delegation, as there is only one as I described, and whose official members I listed individually. There may be an arbitrary number of additional attendees, but they are not part of the official delegation of five. Did you catch that? Can anyone read my original piece and not understand the point I was making? Good, so let's see how Weasel Boy finally tries to, well, weasel his way out of admitting he was wrong. Can you guess? Go on, guess. Really. That's right -- he redefines the concept of the word "delegation":

CC: Ah, so you're claiming that DeLay really is part of the U.S. delegation to the Vatican?

WB: I'm not claiming it. THE NEWS is.

Of course, the news piece he links to claims no such thing, as it describes DeLay being part of a "26-member House delegation", or a "bipartisan Congressional delegation", making it clear that this is not the official one. But that's OK for Weasel Boy -- he sees the word and just seizes the carp, as they say.

Weasel Boy does, of course, completely ignore other news pieces which draw a clear distinction, like this one:

Some of most most famous Catholics in Congress plan to attend Pope John Paul's funeral even though they won't be part of the official U-S delegation. Senate Majority Leader Bill Frist will lead a group of 14 senators, including Massachusetts Senator Edward Kennedy and Pennsylvania Senator Rick Santorum.

Speaker Dennis Hastert will lead a House delegation of 26 members, including Majority Leader Tom DeLay, Representative John Boehner of Ohio -- and New York Congressman Charles Rangel.

Ah, but what's precision and semantics between friends? The amusing part of all of this is how predictably Weasel Boy is following my earlier four stages of wanker rhetoric. He's like a Mattel toy -- wind him up and watch him redefine terms and change the subject. But since I'm getting tired of this, here's what I'm going to do.

I'm simply going to delete every single comment from now on from Weasel Boy on this site until he offers up an unconditional and unambiguous admission that he was wrong. No weaseling, no redefining terms, no shucking and jiving. Weasel Boy has a long history of making insipid claims, getting called on them, arguing inanely for a short time, then vanishing for several weeks hoping everyone's forgotten how he ran out on the argument just when he was getting pounded.

Not this time, WB. Your claim is crap, and you've been caught dead to rights. Time to take your medicine like a good little weasel. Until you do, no more comments for you. This might be the only possible way to teach you some manners.