Of douchebags and Blogging Tories. And Sandy Crux.

Yes, yes, I know, I should let sleeping idiots lie, but once you get started on Blogging Tory Sandy Crux, it's like eating potato chips -- once you get started, she just gets stupider and stupider. Welcome to the latest affront to intelligent discourse:

The Dardos Award is given for recognition of cultural, ethical, literary, and personal values transmitted in the form of creative and original writing. These stamps were created with the intention of promoting fraternization between bloggers, a way of showing affection and gratitude for work that adds value to the Web.

Yes, you know what's coming but be polite and wait for it:

This morning, I (Crux-of-the-Matter) received a Premio Dardos Award nomination from Harold Doherty of Facing Autism in New Brunswick.

Because as we all know, nothing says "laudable accomplishment" like getting a nomination for an unknown award from someone else in your incestuous, hermetically-sealed little clique. I'm guessing there was more than a little quid pro quo happening there and, in a wild coincidence, Harold is also a nominee. But I digress. Let's keep reading:

I share with him the hope for a national autism strategy and improvements in the availability of publicly funded autism treatment and ...

I'm sorry, wait, what!? "Publicly funded?" As in, paid for by taxpayers?

Refresh my memory, kids, but isn't it Canada's conservatives -- led by Stephen Taylor's whiny contingent of Blogging Tories -- who have been howling long and loud about wasting taxpayer funds, and being prudent guardians of the public purse, and fiscal responsibility? And isn't it those same shrieking yokels who keep defending cuts in funding to, oh, the Status of Women Canada? And the arts? And political parties?

And yet, curiously, here's BT Sandy, openly calling for public funding for the treatment of autism because, well, because one of her kids just happens to be autistic. Here, let me tighten that up for you just a touch: "The taxpayers should pay for what I want, but not for what you want." In short, Sandy's good with cuts to damned near everything, except she still wants to pick your pocket to support her and her squalling, autistic brat.

Apparently, in Sandy's world, it's only socialism if someone else gets something out of it.

I'M SORRY, THERE'S SO MUCH MORE. I have to apologize since, when I encountered that particular bit of gorge-inducing horror above when reading that post, I simply stopped reading, not realizing that it got, oh, so much better:

A condition of accepting a Premio Dardos award is that I must now nominate five other blogs and inform the authors of those blogs.

I'm sorry, run that by me again -- once you're nominated for that award, all you need to do to get one is nominate five other people? That's it!? Oh, my word, the exclusivity! But hang on to your panties, because Sandy's nominees are, well, to die for. Or something like that.

There's the passive-aggressive, perpetually-conflicted and not even remotely closet racist Raphael Alexander. Then there's the intellectually adolescent "Hunter" of the BT web site "Climbing Out of the Dark," whose legacy for all time will be the horrifically non-prescient idiocy:

What was gained? Nothing, except showing how scared the lefties are of Sarah Palin.

And then there's JoJo, whose value to the blogosphere is, what exactly? Oh:

She also provides regular videos of all things parliament and has been known to spend a great deal of time putting the Harper Goverment Accomplishments on video.

Quite so: Hunter is an indispensable web resource since she spent a considerable amount of time pimping out Sandy's depressingly dishonest list of Stephen Harper's "accomplishments." Nothing like a wheelbarrow full of quid pro quo to demean an award contest entirely.

And remember, boys and girls, Sandy has a doctorate in education, and you don't. But please, don't spit on any people who have doctorates in education just because of that. It's quite possible that, in other peoples' cases, all that education actually took.