Yes, yes, it's an old joke -- when his lips are moving. And, sadly, that's the only logical attitude to take these days when dealing with Canada's various branches of law enforcement: As a starting point, simply assume that they're lying, and proceed accordingly.
After all, what other conclusion is even possible? As the latest example, there is of course the case of Robert Dziekanski -- a case in which the RCMP lied outrageously, only to be caught dead to rights by the video. Go ahead -- read it slowly to appreciate what sort of dishonest swine are our heroic boys in red. And, no, of course it doesn't stop there.
How about this beaut:
Lawyer Alan Gold told the judge that when [Const. Roy] Preston got to the scene he believed Jama Jama was about to assault a man lying on the ground.
When Jama Jama refused to obey his orders, continued Gold, the officer was justified to punch him in the face "to bring him under control and ensure the officer's safety."
But when a videotape of the incident later surfaced, and was played again yesterday, it clearly showed Preston moving quickly towards Jama Jama as he backed up, giving no resistance to the officer who suddenly gave him a roundhouse left to the jaw.
Notice a pattern here? Why, yes -- that it was damned lucky that someone happened to be around catching the whole thing on video. And how could we ever forget the "Our officers never posed as protestors, excuse me, you have pictures? Um, all right, then."
Which should, I hope you can appreciate, teach you two fundamental lessons. Lesson 1: If a law enforcement officer says it, just assume it's a lie. You're more than likely to be right, and it just saves time.
And the second lesson? Ah, here's the more important one -- make sure you have video. Seriously, if you're preparing for something at which there is even the slightest chance of an encounter with Canada's finest, make damned sure you have video, and backup video, and triple redundant backup video for your backup video. Because, as sure as Werner Patels is mentally ill, if things go south and you don't have some hard evidence to back up your side of the story, well, you're fucked. Utterly and totally. It's that simple.
Once upon a time, it used to be that you looked to the cops for protection. These days, though, you have to wonder who's going to protect you from them. Life sure is funny sometimes, isn't it?