Saturday, March 17, 2007

Alberto Gonzales Death Watch.


Place your bets, kids:

The fallout from the firings continues to grow in Washington, and sources tell CBS News that it looks like Attorney General Alberto Gonzales will take the fall.

Republicans close to the White House tell CBS News chief White House correspondent Jim Axelrod that President Bush is in "his usual posture: pugnacious, that no one is going to tell him who to fire." But sources also said Gonzales' firing is just a matter of time.

For bonus points, predict the actual wording he'll use, from this list of sure-fire, popular Republican spin phrases:

  • "partisan witch hunt"

  • "Democratic witch hunt"

  • "politics of personal destruction"

  • "I take full responsibility"

  • "mistakes were made" (ah, the delightful passive voice)

  • "becoming a distraction to the administration"

  • "spend more time ..."

    • "... with my family"

    • "... with my colleagues"

    • "... shredding the Constitution"

    • "... violating everyone's civil rights"

    • "... torturing foreigners"

  • "I'm sorry, I don't really remember."

  • "Go fuck yourselves."

Enter early, enter often. Lines are open, and operators are standing by to ignore your calls.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Firing Abu Gonzo isn't that simple. His replacement wouldl have o be confirmed by the US Senate. Who will Dear Leader get to replace him? How will things go in the Senate.

The good news is that I think Rick Santorum is a lawyer who currently is between jobs.

Anonymous said...

Call me crazy but...

What's that?
You already do?

Okay, we got that cleared up but dollars will get you donuts, my dough is on Gonzo opting out of life in the fast lane for health reasons.
Not from a bum ticker or a brain wasting disease, no sir.

I threw a dart at the excuse board and it landed on 'a prolapsed rectum'.
Apart from the excruciating pain it caused, it does makes sense considering the reaming that's in store for him in the next few weeks.

Still waiting for it?

And, you bet, it'll goll darn near kill him.

PS: Dollars will also get you a double double and a cranberry/blueberry muffin - might as well make it a sweet wager.