Monday, September 11, 2006

Damian Penny: Because nuance is for pussies.


Sometimes, it's a tough call as to whether Damian Penny is being deliberately obtuse, or whether he's really as unspeakably dense as his writing would suggest:

HOLLYWOOD IRONY

While the left throws a massive hissy fit over inaccuracies in The Path to 9/11, the hot ticket at the Toronto International Film Festival is a fake documentary ["Death of a President"] in which President Bush is murdered:

Um ... I'm sorry, I don't quite see the irony there. See, "Death of a President" is quite openly a work of fiction, while "The Path to 9/11" represented itself as a fact-based documentary. See how that works, Damian? It means that your comparison isn't worth, well, shit. But Damian's on a roll, so let's move aside and let the madness continue:

If an American cable network (I think we can safely assume no broadcast network will touch Death of a President) or film distributor picks up the movie, don't expect the Kossacks and HuffPosters to launch any boycott campaigns against it.

Uh ... but why would they boycott? Pay attention, Damian -- fiction versus documentary. How is it possible that you can't appreciate the difference? Oh, wait:

Mind you, the two aren't exactly the same: The Path to 9/11 is a docudrama that takes dramatic licence to show the Clinton Administration's (and Bush Administration's) missed opportunities to take down Osama bin Laden, while Death of a President portrays the murder of a sitting President, and the framing of an innocent Arab for his murder (of course!) to criticize post-9/11 American "paranoia." Big difference.

Ah. So Damian does understand the massive distinction -- he's just being a total dick by ignoring it. In Damian's world, I'm guessing that passes for clever. But, hang on:

(The anti-Path crowd is also trying to draw a distinction between a docudrama shown on network television - the public airwaves - and in movie theatres.

Whoops, scratch that -- now we're back to not understanding the difference again. It must be tough being Damian Penny -- you're never quite sure which demented personality is going to bubble up and take command of the keyboard, so you have to be ready for anything.

CC HQ: Your one-stop shop for rapid-response snark. 30 minutes or it's free.

DOUBLE PLUS GOOD AND JUST PLAIN SNARKERRIFIC: Damian writes, "While the left throws a massive hissy fit over inaccuracies in The Path to 9/11 ...". Apparently, it's not just "the left" that is some kind of pissed.

Some advice to Damian's buddies: Do not ask him for legal advice. Seriously. Or medical advice. He's probably pretty bad at that, too.

(DISCLAIMER: There's some debate as to whether that threat of legal action is genuine, but you have to think AA at least has grounds for thinking about it.)

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

What must it be like being as goddamn fucking stupid as Damian Penny? Honestly, what must it be like to wake up in the morning knowing that being able to tie your own shoelaces will be your greatest intellectual achievement for the day?

Paladiea said...

"Honestly, what must it be like to wake up in the morning knowing that being able to tie your own shoelaces will be your greatest intellectual achievement for the day?"

Ah there's the catch. He doesn't know. He's that dumb.

Havril said...

How does the fact that you can watch one, but not the other, clad only in your underwear factor into this?